devil at my door - lrh

2 - ya moody bitch

elle

waking up this morning, i felt like a teenager again.

the same headache from my hangover, the same exhaustion that walked hand in hand with the confusion of whatever the fuck happened last night.

i do remember one thing, and the soreness between my legs is adamant that i don't forget.

not much happened after i'd left the bathroom with calum, nothing memorable at least.

we stayed in that bathroom for about 30 minutes, emerging to a line of annoyed, drunk women. i have no doubt that they know exactly what we were doing in there, but i don't mind.

it was the first time in a long time i'd finally been given the opportunity to do something reckless again.

growing up in a strictly religious household, you learn to become a pretty damn good liar.

and i was a spectacular one, until i got caught... and arrested. and my parents had to bail me out.

after that car ride home, i'd decided that losing my family's trust was worse than losing the adrenaline rush i thought i needed to survive. so i decided to clean my act up, get my life on track, and be better.

although it's been working out very smoothly, it's impossible to deny how much i miss being so careless, being selfish about what i want to do with my time. and last night felt like the smallest glimpse into who i was, who i know i still am, but who i can't be anymore.

like i said, my thought process during my drive home from work always consisted of the same thoughts. and as i pull into the driveway of my little house shared with ruthie and myla, i say yet another prayer to whatever is out there, to let me live again.

twisting the key in the lock and shoving the door open, the house is calm and quiet, no fire alarms, no loud music, just ruthie and myla cuddled up on the couch with the tv on low, surrounded by snacks and blankets.

"hey, guys." i greet them as i push the door closed and twist the lock, moving to set my keys on the counter and dropping my bag on the floor.

myla moves to sit up after she'd noticed my arrival, while ruthie follows, lifting the remote to pause their show as they adjust themselves. "hey, elle, how was work?" myla asks.

"oh you know," i move to sit next to them on the couch, leaning forward to untie the laces of my high tops, "the usual, rehearsal then technique class" once my shoes were kicked off, i turned to lay my head in myla's lap and she tugged the hair tie out of my hair, letting my ponytail fall loose and my hair sprawl out over her thighs.

"oh my god... guess what, elle!" ruthie begins, still speaking quietly as to not rupture the calmness of the evening, but also speaking with so much excitement. she'd pressed her hands into the cushion by her hips and twisted to face me.

i look up at her in my upside down position, giggling a bit at her enthusiasm, "what?"

"we figured out who moved in next door." she smirks and pumps her eyebrows up and down a few times, waiting patiently for my response.

"really? who?" i asked, looking at myla now as she tugged small knots out of my hair.

"well we don't know them yet, but we saw them..." ruthie continues, standing to make her way to the window facing the new neighbors house. "but it's a group of boys..." she finished excitedly, pressing her hands on the windowsill and leaning outside. "we should make them a "welcome to the neighborhood" cake! or lasagna or something, i don't know..." ruthie says, still staring at the house.