Boys Don't Cry - Steddie

Chapter 12

"So you're mad at them for leaving you?"

"Yes... No." He held his head in his hands, "I don't know. Like, I tried so hard to get their attention. In literally any way. Basketball, swimming, girlfriends, parties, grades... nothing worked. And then I graduated and didn't go to school and all of a sudden my dad just... hated me. Said I was a disgrace and a failure, making the family look bad, I'd never amount to anything, needed to learn a lesson about working hard, shit like that. Like I said, it never gets too bad. My mom keeps him in check, but that's about it."

"I'm sorry."

He shrugged, "You shouldn't be. I guess I still have it better than other people, so I probably shouldn't be whining about it."

"I probably would have agreed with that like a month ago. But you've gone through a lot. And other people's experiences are different than yours, but that doesn't change anything. That doesn't change how you feel."

"Thanks," he sounded unconvinced, but Eddie expected that. It was difficult to change someone's mindset.

"I guess we both have shitty parents."

"Yeah, I guess."

Eddie decided to change the subject. "You mind if I smoke outside?"

"Like... cigarettes? Or..."

"Or what?" An amused smile played at Eddie's lips.

"Or.. dope."

"Dope?" The smile turned into a laugh.

"What? That's- what are you laughing at?"

"I guess you're really out of the loop now, Harrington."

"That's what we always called it! I'm not out of the loop I used to smoke all the time at parties! Tommy H. would always..." he shook his head and stopped talking when Eddie started nodding enthusiastically, mocking him.

"Oh, no, no, by all means. Please, keep going. Don't let me stop you."

"I haven't ever actually smoked outside of a party. And I haven't been to a party in... a while."

"Weed. People call it weed now."

Steve nodded, "Right, well, either way are you sure that's the best idea while you're still on those meds from the hospital?"

"You're making it sound like I asked to do lines on your coffee table." Steve raised his eyebrows in response, and Eddie could tell what he was thinking. "No! God, no, I don't do cocaine. It's JUST the weed. I promise."

"Fine. Go ahead. Just keep it outside, yeah?"

"You can say no, you know."

"I know."

They sat on the side of Steve's pool, their legs in the water. Eddie's beat up lunchbox was nestled between them. Steve watched as Eddie pulled a joint from the small case he kept in the box and brought it up to his lips before digging through the lunchbox again for a lighter.

"I'm still not sure if this is the greatest thing to do while you're still recovering."

"Then you can help me," he spoke around it as he brought his hand up to shield the lighter from the breeze. Okay... maybe Steve thought it was a little attractive.

"Maybe a little bit," he watched as Eddie dropped the lighter back in the lunchbox and flipped the lid back over. He pulled the joint away from his lips and a cloud of smoke followed shortly after. Yeah, he was right. It was a little attractive. He thanked Eddie as he took the joint from him, eyeing it up before he took a drag. Well, tried to. It got caught in his throat and he ended up coughing dryly. "The hangover was bad. This is just embarrassing."