Simple Complexity

Part 8

'Abby!' Patty cried as she began to run down the stairs, the shorter woman meeting her as she rushed towards her from the kitchen.

'I heard it,' Abby replied as the two of them ran at full speed outside, guns in hands, running towards the barn, a small glow inside, the blonde's torch.

'Shit,' Patty said as she clipped her proton gun behind her, the two entering the barn.

'Call an ambulance,' Abby cried as she slid to her knees next to the blonde, she was in a crumpled pile on the floor, blood pooling from her head, and she had no pulse. Abby pulled off the woman's proton back, laying her on her back, and began CPR. Patty paced the space next to her, her face already covered in tears as she spoke on the phone to paramedics.

'How long?' Abby asked, as she worked on the engineer, Patty now next to her, putting pressure on the head wound, her breath hard and fast and Patty responded breathless, phone still against her ear,' Twenty minutes.'

'We don't have twenty minutes,' Abby cried as she continued to give Holtzmann mouth to mouth, pumping away at her chest, choking back her tears as she tried to breathe, trying to save her friend.

Whatever entity was in the barn had gone, disappeared and it was the last thing on the women's minds.

Patty took Holtzmann's hand in hers, then touched her neck checking for a pulse.

'Abs,' Patty said desperately, her tears still falling, 'Abby.'

'I'm trying,' Abby wailed back, 'I'm...Holtz, Holtzy, I'm trying Patty.'

The ice cold of the night was biting at Erin, she could feel it attack her ears, nose, her fingertips and she dug her hands into her pockets, her tears falling a little harder as her hand brushed the Swiss Army knife. She clutched it in her palm and began to sob, walking as fast as she could towards the Firehouse.

The feeling in the pit of her stomach was now enveloping her, it coursed through her like an animal finally clawing its way out of its cage, one that she'd kept locked.

She suddenly realised why she was always returning there, to work, the Firehouse, to Holtzmann. She suddenly realised why she needed Jillian. Why she needed her to touch her, hold her, fall asleep with her. Why she needed to put her arms around her. Why she needed Jillian to dance with her.

She wanted Jillian.
She needed Jillian.

She wanted to kiss her.
She needed to kiss her.

She wanted to tell her that she needed her.
She needed to tell her she was in love with her.

As she approached the building she unlocked the door, rushing in, walking into darkness and she flicked on the light, about to call out and run up the stairs to find the blonde but then she remembered: they had been called to a Bust.

Erin's body felt like it was ready to collapse, the feelings she'd pushed away were now all consuming and she let out an audible sob. The woman climbed the stairs slowly, each step taking extreme effort and she let her heels make a loud tap on each step, pausing as she reached the lab. She flipped on the light, leaning into the doorframe, the reality of the engineer not being there felt like a slap in the face, and she felt it sting and she gave in to the feeling, allowing more tears fall.

Erin turned away from the doorway, leaving the light on and walking over to the bedrooms, reaching out for her own door handle, and then changing her mind, reaching for Holtzmann's instead, stepping inside. Her eyes gazed over the neatness of the room, it was nothing like the chaos of the engineer's desk and lab and Erin slid off her shoes and took off her jacket, pulling out the knife, climbing into the bed clutching it close to her chest. She pushed her face into the pillow with a smile, scents of cinnamon, soldiering and maybe peppermint filling her nose. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, the last of her tears sliding down her cheeks and she drifted quickly to sleep.