You And Your Dead Poets. "The Outsiders" FanFiction

Chapter Fifteen: Breakdowns and Interigations

As we walked back to the Curtis house,Soda carried me. My ribs hurt and I just wanted to be held. I can't explain how I felt, but I just wanted to be held and told that everything was going to be okay.

As we walked into Curtis house. Johnny, Dally and Darry had showed up. They all stood up when we came in.

"Is she oka-." Steve started. But soda just held up and hand.

"She's fine, she needs a minute." He said softly. I wanted to hide, embarrassed. Soda took me upstairs, and set me down on the bed.

"Lay down okay?" He smiled sadly.

"Will you lay with me?" I whispered. He looked at me for a moment before nodding his head and climbing into the bed.

He pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around me. I buried my face in the crook of his neck, he stroked my hair and hummed 'here comes the sun.' I was warm and comfortable.

For the first time in a very long time. I felt safe.

I fell asleep to the sound of soda humming and the feeling of him holding me. And for some reason,  I thought 'I wanna fall asleep to this everyday.'

**

When I awoke, I was alone. I remembered the events that led to me falling asleep in sodas arms. I instantly cursed myself. I momentarily got upset.

'Im not suicidal' I thought. I was being dramatic I was angry. I'm fine. I'm happy and everything is great. I have soda. And I have Steve and the gang. I have Evie. I have lots of people. Life is good. And I am happy.

I stood up and instantly winced at the pain in my ribs. I cursed myself and continued out of the room and down to the kitchen. I stopped on the stairs when I heard voices.

"So, she's suicidal?" I heard a voice ask. Shit.

"No, everything just caught up with her and didn't know how to deal with it. I don't think she's suicidal I think she's just overwhelmed. And emotional and physically drained." Another said.

"We'll what do we do?" Another said.

"We keep an eye on her. Let her know we're here. Don't push her. And make sure she knows everything's okay." Another said.

I quietly, crept back up the stairs, stomped my feet slightly. Then loudly walked down the stairs, to let them know I'm coming. When I walked into the kitchen I saw 7 pairs of eyes staring at me.

"Hey," I said nervously. "Look. I'm sorry bout earlier. I was just upset. I didn't mean anything I said alright?"

Everyone kind of just nodded or mumbled an 'alright'.

"Uh steve can we go home? I'm tired," I said looking at the ground.

"Yeah sure." He smiled softly. I walked through the kitchen without saying goodbye. I was embarrassed about how I acted. I walked to the door, steve following behind me. I walked to the car and got in.

"So uh," I said as steve got in and turned the truck on.

"I'm really sorry for hitting you. I didn't mean it." I said, looking at my hands.

"Hey," he looked at me. "It's okay. I shouldn't have pushed you. And I'm sorry." He said. I smiled and looked at him.

"It's okay." I said, he smiled and pulled me into the hug.

"But if you do ever need to talk. About anything, I'm here, okay?"

"Okay." I said. And with that we drove home. I instantly headed to the shower. I quickly showered, got dressed and climbed into bed. As soon as I pulled the covers up around me there was a knock.