cruel of you | h.hj & l.fl

felix, not cupcake

He has the nerve to stare at the baby without putting the diaper on. A disgrace!

"Sweetie," Hyunjin calls to him without answering his initial request. It is a polite request, mind you, and he expects something more than another endearment that is just as wack as the other one. Let him live. "Jeongin is about to cry, I can feel it."

While he struggles to pull out a diaper from the baby bag that Minho pushed to his arms earlier, Hyunjin walks to his side, poking him on his waist and is literally disturbing his very little amount of peace and personal space.

"I will change his diaper, okay? Please stop poking me—" He shoots a glance at Hyunjin and peers down to look for the said diaper, but instead of answering to his other request, Hyunjin just pokes him again.

"Cupcake, come on." And again.

"Our baby is now opening his mouth." And again.

"And there he goes—" And again, as signaled by Jeongin first huff of air and a loud cry.

It's not like he is asking for too much, right? It's not like he doesn't deserve at least a bit of sanity inside a household that he strives and struggles to maintain. It's not like Jeongin's cries are the worst. It's not like Hyunjin isn't doing much for him to actually snap and just fall into a massive breakdown. It's not like it's his fault anymore for losing the strength to conquer the remaining hours of midnight and actually be able to take care of two babies and himself.

It's not his fault. He stands with this thought.

"Then do something!" He kind of shrieks—somewhere in between a yell and an order—and rolls his eyes away from everything else.

Jeongin is crying. A cry that absolutely wrecks his eardrums and probably Hyunjin's too, basing on the way Hyunjin first thought of putting his palms over his two ears rather than holding the baby. It is also a cry that tells him something more than the fact that Jeongin is already cold. It is a cry that kind of resonates with him because trust him, he will cry too.

"Because maybe, instead of just looking at him and covering your ears, you could've picked the warm blanket up and put it around his thighs and I don't know, be a husband the way you're telling yourself to be!"

He is on the edge. He knows this.

He's not usually like this. He doesn't usually feel his ears warm up from the tension that he just released. He doesn't usually feel some tears on the brim of his eyes all because of a frustration that stems from everything that is not solely from Hyunjin. He's not like this, okay? He doesn't really let his emotions get the best of him.

Hyunjin looks at him for a moment and Felix can see the way his gaze changes. He thinks Hyunjin has something to say, but chooses not to when Hyunjin picks Jeongin up slightly and cradles Jeongin to his chest.

"There you go baby," Hyunjin coos and softly presses his fingers on the nape of the fragile child. He also dances a bit, twists slightly, and rocks his body to let Jeongin feel a warm presence around him. "Don't worry, your temporary dad is here, okay?"

He knows he did bad and he wants to admit that. But maybe, the way Hyunjin just looks so soft that way, holding Jeongin so close and so careful, is kind of worth it to witness. He crouches and looks for the diaper that Minho had stored so deep in the said bag.

***

It's almost eight in the morning when he wakes up from the living room couch and almost instantly panics because: 1) he has a work to go to, 2) he has a baby to attend to, and 3) he has himself to prepare for the rest of the day.

He blinks furiously and rubs his eyes. When his feet land on the floor, he only got one pair of the slippers and runs to Jeongin's room, clutching him to remove some debris from his face. He opens the door to see Hyunjin right there, preparing a bottle of milk while the baby is on his other arm.