Yellow Brick Road (an Eazy-E Story)

SIXTEEN

June 29th, 1991 • Lauren

I had been home for at least an hour before hearing my front door unlock. I was in the middle of unpacking both of my suit cases. I looked behind me to see Eric standing there with keys in his hand and a confused look on his face.

"Lauren?" He rushed to me and hugged me tightly. He rocked me back and forth before letting me go. "Where the fuck were you?" He asked angrily.

"Mexico." I said shortly before turning my attention back to unpacking. I let Eric ramble on about how he was scared something had happened to me and how he couldn't get ahold of me and how he thought we were done. I found that part funny. I wasn't sure how to tell him that emotionally, I was off of him. It took me a while to figure out what I wanted out of this entire ordeal when I was in Mexico and it became clear.

I kept my answers to Eric's questions short and concise. He noticed something was off with me. "Why are you being short winded with me, Lauren?" He asked. I didn't say much, separating my clean clothes from the clothes that needed to be washed. He grabbed my arm and asked me the same question again.

"Eric, can we talk when I'm rested? I don't want to do this right now." I sighed, yanking my arm away from him. I walked out of my bedroom and opened the front door. Eric followed me. "Where are you going now?"

"I think you mean where are you going. Cause it looks like you're going home." I said in a smart tone. His face read 'huh?' and I was thoroughly amused by it. "We'll talk soon." I waved him off and into the hallway. I shut the door and locked it back. I leaned my back against the door and made a mental note to change the locks on my apartment door. I called maintenance.

July 4th, 1991 | 1:11pm

Tonya and Ren were sitting on the couch of their new apartment. They decided to throw a Fourth of July cookout slash housewarming party. I had a feeling that this would be the next step in their relationship and I was genuinely happy for them. Their apartment was located in Compton but not too far from Eric's house in Norwalk. I sat on the couch across from them, digging into my plate.

Dre and Nicole were chasing each other around Tonya and Ren's gated backyard with Nerf guns and Yella and Alicia were cozied up to one another in the kitchen. Eric? Well, let's just say he showed up out of obligation. I hadn't been answering his phone calls since I changed the locks on my place. He had been watching me since I got here. I've been doing my best to ignore him.

Tonya and Ren were trying to ask me questions in an attempt to get me to speak to Eric, but I responded "Who's that?" The entire room went quiet. Eric walked over to me and pulled me up from the couch with my plate still in my hand. "With me. Now." Eric lead me to Tonya and Ren's bedroom where it was more quiet and shut the door.

"The fuck is your problem?" Eric put the plate from my hand on their bed and cornered me against the wall. I turned my head so that I wouldn't look him in the eye. "Look at me when I'm talking to you." He turned my head with the curl of his index finger. "I asked you what your problem is." He said in a low voice. His breath warm against my face.

"My problem?" I scoffed in his face. "My problem is you. It's this. All of this." I yelled. "You think I don't know what you do when I'm not around? All the shit I heard when I landed back in LA?" I began hitting his chest with a closed fist. He stood there, unfazed. He let me continue on.

"The shit you're doing with Tracy so you can see Erin? Oh, and let's not forget about some girl running around town talking about how deep you had your dick in her throat." I began to feel tears forming. This isn't me. I'm LJ's sister. Anne and Joseph's daughter. I don't cry. The fuck is this?

I tried to stop the tears but they came out. "I'm not your fucking in home concubine that just runs errands. I'm not some bitch you met off the street that you can treat like a skeezer. I'm a woman, Eric. Your woman, I thought." I hit his chest again. He still didn't move. He just held me until I combusted into a full blown breakdown. I buried my face in his chest and soaked his black and white striped shirt.

"I don't feel like a girlfriend, Eric. I feel like the main girl surrounded by side women. I've been here before with my last relationship and I promise to God, I'm not doing this shit again." I yelled into his chest. "So, either you're going to step up and be the man you say you are or leave me the fuck alone!" I pushed his chest away from my chest. He stepped back, stumbling on his own feet.

After he caught himself, he just looked at me. "You're right, Lauren." He said. He sat at the edge of Tonya and Ren's bed and looked up to where I was standing. I looked down at him with folded arms and my back against the white painted wall. "I'm fucked up, kid. I can't lie." He said with his head hung low. "I'm not known to be with one woman. But, I tried."

"I tried with you because I see myself in female form when I look at you. The way you hold shit down, how you carry yourself. The way you handle business. The way you are around my kids. That's what I love about you." He said. Did I hear this correctly? Love?

"When you up and left, that shit hurt me. I couldn't get ahold of you. I hadn't touched you since I met with Suge that night. I didn't know what else to do." Eric shook his head. "Tracy, she won't let up. And I did it for my daughter."

I kissed my teeth, not believing his words in regards to Tracy. "As far as that bitch Baby Girl is concerned, that was before we got serious. She don't mean shit to me but a pay day." He made a gesture of rubbing dollar bills between his fingertips as he said it. "Believe me, I don't want you to hurt again. You're too pretty to be crying." Eric tried to make light of the situation, but I wasn't going for it.

The whole city knew I was his girl. Hell, we went public on national television. And somehow, he still chooses to disrespect what I was hoping to build with him. I inched closer to the bedroom door, trying to leave as quickly as possible. Not without saying what I had to say.

"Eric, thank you. Thank you for a wonderful experience. I had fun. I really did." I said somberly. "I think you should continue doing what you're doing, just without me." Eric stood up, rushing to my side. "Come on, Lauren. Don't be like that." He rested his hand on the small of my back.

"Fuck whoever you want. Travel the world. See new sights. Do all that shit. When you're ready to be the man you portrayed yourself to be, you know where to hit me. My number will never change." I leaned forward and laid a slow kiss on Eric's lips one last time, dragging my lips against his and pulling away slowly. I stroked his cheek with my thumb and sniffled as I shut the door behind me.