Don't Say You Love Me

Chapter TWENTY EIGHT

   "Maybe you could show up at her house and beg her to forgive you?" He's literally coming up with more ideas than I am, so I'm grateful for that.

   "I can't," I answer, after a moment. "I literally just told her mom yesterday that I wouldn't cause her any drama," I explain, hanging my head.

   "That was stupid." Rex laughs.

   "Yeah."

   "I can try to talk to her? I can tell her that you're not usually this dumb, but -" Rex goes on, but doesn't look hopeful that that's a good idea.

   "No, thanks."

   "Maybe just let it be for a few days and see if she comes around? She likes you, too, right? She kissed you back?" Rex is a really good friend, I know that.

   I nod. "Yeah. But she was so mad."

   "I'd at least give her a little space," Rex finishes. "Also, party tomorrow, down at Tyler C.'s grandparent's beach house..."

   I look up at Rex and shake my head. "That's literally Teegan's mom's neighbour," I spit out, and then remember what Luke said about keeping Rex on a leash. "Hey, do you think I'm too... controlling?"

   "What? Controlling who?" he asks, then laughs.

   "You," I say, but I'm not looking at him anymore. This is embarrassing.

   "Controlling me? What are you talking about?" Rex is genuinely confused, so I feel a bit better.

   "Luke... he said I have you on a tight leash. He was kidding, but I know what he means. He thinks that I tell you what to do, and I-"

   "Co, no," Rex stops me, raising his hand. "Luke and the guys hassle me because I don't hang out with them as often and whatever, but that's not my scene, you know that. I just care about football, and... you're my best friend."

   "Aww, you're so sweet," I tease him. "Go to the party, if you want. But I can't go."

   "Or you could go, and then accidentally bump into Teegan and get her to talk to you-" Rex says and then laughs when I make a face at him. "Too soon?"

   "Yeah. You're right, I need to give her some space. And figure out what I'm really going to do," I finish, and then lay my head back and close my eyes for a minute.

*

It's quarter to 2P.M. the next afternoon and my heart is pounding. She told me she was going to change her shift so she didn't have to see me, and I believe her. But there's still a chance that Teegan will show up in a few minutes and I have to be ready.

   I'm not that lucky. At two minutes until 2P.M., Katrina Powell comes up to the counter of the rental hut. She's small and cute and a year younger than me, and she's Luke's cousin. I think. Her light blonde hair is in braids and she's wearing a bikini, so I assume she wants to rent something.

   "Hey, Cohen," she says right away, knocking on the counter with her knuckles. "Want to let me in?"

   Confusion must fill my face, because she laughs. I can't figure out what is actually happening - why would I let her in? - and before I can ask, she goes on.

   "I'm working the closing shift."

   My heart drops to my stomach. I didn't know she worked here and I now know that Teegan is not coming.

   "Oh, yeah, come on around," I say, trying to sound casual.

   I turn and walk towards the back door and unlock it and Katrina comes in a moment later. She goes right to the mini fridge and gets a bottle of water, cracking it open. After a long sip, she smiles at me.

   "I am usually only here on Saturdays, sometimes. Maybe once during the week. My mom thinks having a part time summer job will be good on my college apps," she tells me, then shrugs.

   I wonder how she even moves the boards and the boats around. She's so tiny.

   "Oh, so, you're filling in today for-" I start, but I don't finish the sentence.

   "I don't know the girl, I guess she's the boss's daughter?" Katrina answers.

   "Right." I sigh. "Are you good, then? Do you need help closing, later?"

   Her face lights up. "Honestly, I do. Luke usually comes back to help if I'm here at closing."

   "I can come back. I don't have anything going on," I say.

   "Cohen, that's so nice. Thanks." She pushes one of her braids over her shoulder.

   "No problem. See you later, then," I finish and sign out before pushing open the door and leaving.

   God, do I want to text Teegan. I want to tell her how sorry I am, and that she should give me another chance because I wasn't lying when I said I like her. But I can't be that desperate and she clearly doesn't want to hear from me. So I walk home. I sit outside until I feel too hot and then I go in and make a sandwich. I check my phone and I call my mom back, who called twice today already. I tell her I'm doing good, even though I'm not. I half-watch a TV show but I mostly think about how badly I screwed up with Teegan.

   When it's 6:30P.M., I put on my sliders and go back outside. I'm just getting to the beach a few minutes later when I see her. She's walking in the sand with her little brother and sister. They are giggling and one is carrying a small blue bucket. We aren't really close to each other, but I know that if she looked up my way, she'd see me. I'm frozen in place, looking at her, but as soon as she does look up and our eyes meet, I turn away and start my walk back down to the pier, my heart beating too fast.