Don't Say You Love Me

Chapter FIFTEEN

Teegan

I am pretty sure every single person who lives in Avila Beach is at the pier tonight. It's almost crowded, and I've never seen it like this before. I guess I've never been here for the fourth, either. I usually come mid July, for one week.

   It's still bright out - warm, sticky air surrounds us - and there's families and kids running around, laughing and playing. There's a big popcorn machine that some younger teenagers are running, and a blow up bounce house, which Oscar has already spent a large amount of time in. My mom is waiting in line with Josie to get her face painted, so I take Oscar over towards the Creamery. They are doing fifty percent off regular cones for the night, so I buy him one and get one for Josie, too.

   "This is the best!" Oscar yells, looking up at me. "There's so many people!"

   "Yeah," I agree, reaching for his hand. I do not want to lose him. Just thinking about that makes my heart sink.

   "There's my friend, Matthew! Hi, Matthew!" he yells again, letting go of my hand to wave wildly.

   "Hi Oscar!" the dark haired boy yells back.

   "Let's go find Mom! I want to tell her that I saw Matthew," Oscar says to me, and I reached down for his hand again. He's eating his ice cream happily and grins at me as we start making our way back to the face painting booth.

   It's a bit hectic making our way back over to where Josie is now almost at the front of the line. Oscar runs over to tell Mom about seeing his friend, and I look around a bit, taking everything in. We've been here for less than an hour and I feel overwhelmed. But it's really fun being a part of this, with my siblings.

   "Hey, girl!" I hear someone yell, off to my left.

   Looking over, I see Riss and Harlow, standing with two guys that I don't recognize. Riss is wearing a red and blue sun dress and her hair is in two pig tails with red scrunchies. Harlow is wearing red pants and a blue tank top. Very festive.

   "Hey," I say to them, even though we aren't really all that close to each other. I look to make sure my mom is with both kids before I walk over a bit closer to them.

   "Who are you here with?" Riss asks me, as one of the guys slips an arm around her waist.

   "Oh, my mom and my little brother and sister," I say, without thinking.

   Harlow laughs, her face sort of twisted up. "You mean Lola's brother and sister?"

   "Harlow," Riss snaps at her, and shakes her head at me. "Sorry."

   I shrug. "It's fine. I mean, yeah, they are both of our siblings."

   "Riss, let's go. I want to get sno cones," the guy says to her, and is already pulling at her to keep moving.

   "See you in a bit, at the party?" Riss asks me, looking hopeful

   "Yeah, maybe," I call back, and watch them go.

   And right then I realize that even though I fit in with my mom and her family better than I thought I would, I don't fit in anywhere else, here in Avila. I'm not going to have friends this summer, besides Oscar and Josie, and hopefully my mom. I'll work, and sun tan, and let these new relationships with my family blossom over the next six weeks. But I'm not going to try to make friends with these kids who I'll never see again after this summer.

   And I feel just fine about that, especially as I'm laying out the blanket that my Mom brought and little Josie is climbing into my lap, an hour later. It's just dark out now and there was an announcement from somewhere that the fireworks would be starting in five minutes. The beach is filled with chairs and blankets and giggling, excited children. Oscar sits besides me and squeezes my hand. My mom is standing, chatting with two other moms. Everything about this feels so right.