Heartstrings - Forbidden Hearts Series Prequel

54| I've Learned From My Mistakes

Karma looked away shyly. It was something she didn't do often, but when she did I thought it was the cutest thing. "I don't know about that."

"Come on," I whispered, loving any opportunity to praise her. "You're gorgeous. You're funny. You're witty and smart." Her eyes met mine again. "Plus, you drive me crazy."

She laughed and nibbled on her bottom lip. "You think so?"

"I know so," I vowed. "I would follow you anywhere, Karma." My lips brushed hers lightly. "Kiss me."

She pulled back playfully. "Nope."

When she got to her feet, I did the same. "Come on, Karma. Lay one on me."

"I don't think so!" She started running from me then, laughing as she did so. That sound was music to my hears. "You said you would follow me anywhere, right? Well, you gotta catch me to kiss me!"

I couldn't hold back my smile as I chased after her. I chased her around the vast space as she ducked behind trees. It was in that moment that I realized that I would chase Karma Fitzgerald anywhere. Everywhere. Nothing would come between us when we were this happy. I would sacrifice anything to be with her. Just like I know she would for me.

When I finally caught her, I scooped her up in my arms. She giggled and it sent chills down my spine.

"I told you I would follow you anywhere, baby. Now kiss me."

With a sultry smile and passion-filled eyes, she wrapped her arms around my neck before giving me a kiss so deep and slow that it leveled me. The only way it could have been better was if I was inside her when it happened. Fuck. The way she kissed me told me exactly what she was feeling. It was the same thing I was feeling.

But neither of us said the words.

And that was alright. Because right now, we didn't need words. Only this.

***

"Did Karma like the gift?"

I smiled before I sat the now empty picnic basket on the kitchen table. "Yeah, mom. She did."

My mom brushed her hands on her apron before she walked over to give me a hug. "I'm so proud of you, Nate. The changes I've seen in you this year...You're dad and I are really proud."

It meant a lot to hear those words. I didn't have enough fingers and toes to count the number of times that I've gotten lectures about how much they weren't proud of me. How much I'd let them down with my choice of lifestyle. This was a nice change of pace.

"Mom, I told you that all this sweet talk wasn't going to get me to apply to college," I said jokingly.

She swatted me lightly on the shoulder. "Don't lie to me, Nate. Karma already told me that you and her talked about going to college together."

Shit. My girl seemed to have loose lips when she was chatting with my mom. But that's how Mama Jenkins was. She made you feel like you could tell her anything. I couldn't be pissed at Karma for it. Especially when it was the truth.

She and I spent a whole afternoon talking about the pros and cons of the both of us attending college. Well, it was mostly pros. Technically just one: she and I going together. College was never something I wanted. Ever. I thought it was a waste of time to go to college for four years after attending high school for the same amount of time.

But when I was staring into her eyes, I imagined picking classes with her. Arguing over who got the last textbook from the bookstore for the class we shared. Or sitting with her at lunch while she rattled away about how her day had been.

That's when I thought...how could I not go to college with her? How could I not take advantage of spending that extra time with her? Because if I didn't go, Karma still would. And that was more time apart.

In a way, it felt like her going without me was a pause I put on my life.

She would grow. I would stay the exact same.

So I filled out a few applications with her. And here we were.

"Yes, mom. I applied." A corner of my mouth lifted. "Don't get too excited, though. Who knows if they're crazy enough to let me into the school."

"Of course you'll get in! You're my son, Nate. I know how smart you are, even if you've made some stupid mistakes over the past few years."

"Nice, mom."

"Well, I'm serious," she said in her classic Jenkins tone. "I've been so worried about you. But I raised you and Lanie to be your own person and I wanted you to learn from your mistakes on your own."

Oh, I learned from my mistakes alright. Big time. Once I started dating Karma, all the other girls I was with before her, all the hooking up and pursuing, seemed like a huge waste of time. It made me feel dirty and pathetic. Like a fucking man-whore.

There were times I wished I could take it all back and do it all over. Just be with Karma that whole time instead. Then instead of me taking her virginity, it would be both of us losing it together. But then again, if everything that happened didn't happen, I might not have her like I did today. We might not have been as happy as we were today.

A mental image of Karma jumping into my arms from a few hours ago popped into my head. Yeah, I wouldn't change a goddamn thing.

Hugging my mom tightly, I murmured, "I've learned from my mistakes, mom. All of them." I inhaled a deep breath. "And as much as you wanted me to do everything on my own, I wouldn't be the man I am today without you and dad."

"I love you, Nate," she said softly as she returned my hug. "And I love Karma, too."

My mom's words resonated inside me so deeply that all I wanted to do was tell my mom that I loved Karma, too. That I was crazy in love with her. But I couldn't do that because I needed to say it to my gorgeous girlfriend first.

I just needed to work up the damn courage.