Shadows: A Six of Crows Fan fic

Chapter Twenty-One: Kaz

A/N See, I told you I'd be back. LOL, yes I am back and I hope that some of you out there are still wanting to read this. On my break, I was able to gain some sanity back as well as some new ideas for what'll happen next. I hope y'all enjoy and I'll be going back on the previous schedule of posting every two weeks starting now!

Kaz's heart beat wildly in his chest. A ravaging animal desperate to get back to the food it was so harshly stolen from. But this time, Kaz's brain had won the fight. Even in such a drunken, delirious state, whatever small sane part of his mind that had yet to be eradicated by Inej's touch had heard the sound of Jesper's approach and flung him away from her. The other, larger part of his brain was screaming at the smaller part to have shut up. To have let him close that minuscule distance between them, Jesper be damned.

But instead, here he stood. Back to having a chasm of space in between them because of his fears. The smell of rot and the sound of smacking water faded from his mind. As soon as he'd jumped away Inej had been surprised and hurt had flashed across her face, but as soon as Jesper had said his piece all previous feelings for what had happened vanished. In their place were only determination and worry for her ship.

Now she threw a coat over her shoulders in a flourish, flipped her captain's hat on, and swept past Jesper to do what she was made for. Lead her crew.

"Not a word," Kaz whispered with a huff as he brushed past a smirking Jesper in the doorway and followed her into the howling storm.

Waves crashed against the boat and rain pelted them from above. Kaz was soaked through after only seconds of being on deck. Lightning flashed above them illuminating the faces of the crew as they gritted their teeth against the cold and worked the lines. Thunder followed too closely behind for his liking. The night was dark and the cloud cover blacked out every star. Only by the periodical flash of lighting and the few remaining lit lanterns could he see the boat he swayed on. He tried searching out in the blackened sea for the other ships of Dawa's fleet, but Kaz saw only the white froth of cresting waves and the splatter of wind-swept ocean. He could hear only the ringing of bells and the shouts of men, but nothing made sense to him in the mess of it all.

Another wave crashed against the boat shaking the hull and sending Kaz stumbling forward. Only the help of his cane caught him from falling flat on his face.

Kaz searched for Inej in the chaos, spinning frantically around— an irrational part of him fearing she'd gone overboard— until he found her at the helm of her ship yelling to Specht over the storm. He watched as with a nod Inej took control of the ship's helm and started yelling at her crew. Not only directions but words of encouragement. Things a captain would say to a flagging crew. Things he would have said to his crew when a job was going sour.

The wind blew her hair around her face and whipped her coat against her, water splashed on her face and rain pelted her body, but still, she stood strong at the helm. She was calm and collected, determined to get them through the thick of the storm no matter what with a confidence Kaz had never seen in her before.

A willingness to be seen. A need that she'd never expressed before. A straight back that bore the weight of her crew's fears and held them back from the breaking point.

She was in her element, and he was going to have to let her stay there. She wasn't just his spider anymore.

The realization came over him suddenly but as soon as it happened, he felt calm. As if it was always meant to be. He'd given her this ship all those weeks ago for a reason. He'd always known, at least in part, that the ship would mean she'd have to leave him but now he saw the full truth of it.