3 weeks later.
i hadn't talked to Will. I figured he wouldn't want to, after that day in the hospital. He made it clear enough that he didn't want to see me.
I was with max, talking after she had just called Will.
-"he's been asking about you." She said, walking with her bike to her side."
-"what? What has he said?" I ask, surprised.
-"he wanted to know how you were doing. If you were okay, that kind of stuff. He worries about you, Mike."
-"I thought he hated me." I look to my feet.
-"I think a part of him is still mad, but he always expects you to be there every time we visit. He always asks where you are. You should see him."
-"I cant do that, max. He made sure I knew never to come by again."
-"c'mon, mike! you could regret not visiting him. He's been going through a lot in there. It turns out he's sicker than we thought, his mom was going to meet with his therapist today, you should go with her. She probably doesn't want to go alone."
-"I mean, I would love to visit him. I'm just scared. I really messed up and I'm the reason he's in there." I push my hair back.
-"mike, how many times do I need to say it? he's been sick before everything happened, ever since we were kids he's always been fucked in the head. He's just now snapping. it has nothing to do with you." She reassured me.
-"thanks for saying that." I said, feeling better a bit.
I walked home after she and I split up, as I walked into my house and was about to go upstairs, the downstairs phone rang. I walked to the phone and picked it up.
-"hello?" I leaned against the wall.
-"mike? It's Joyce."
-"Mrs Byers? Hi, how are you?" I stood up straight.
-"I'm fine, I was wondering if you wanted to go with me to the meeting with Will and his therapist? will really wants to see you."
-"did he say that?"
-"well no, I can just tell. He asks about where you are all the time. And besides, I don't really want to be alone with Jonathan at work."
-"no, of course. I'll go with. What time?"
-"I can pick you up in about an hour or two?"
-"that's great, thank you Mrs Byers." I smiled before hanging up the phone. I was so nervous, I haven't seen him in a while. I hope he's better.
i didn't wear anything special, I wore jeans and a plain white shirt.
She picked me up around 5, the hospital was 45-60 minutes away. I couldn't stop fidgeting the entire ride there. Joyce noticed, and put her hand on my shoulder.
-"don't be nervous, he won't yell this time."
-"I don't know about that." I chuckled weakly.
-"he won't! he will be surprised, he's convinced after he yelled at you the last time, you wouldn't come by."
-"I mean, he's my best friend. I miss him." I lied, he was my best friend, but not just my best friend.
-"mike, I can read right through you." she said.
-"what? What are you talking about?" I laughed trying not to get caught.
-"it was very obvious you guys were dating. You don't have to be embarrassed, I'm fine with it. I won't tell anyone either until either one of you want me to." She explained, I was so shocked.
-"oh, thanks." I said nervously, she chuckled.
we parked outside the hospital, the place just gave me a weird vibe when I walked in. It was cold and smelt like lemon.
we waited outside his therapist office until she was ready to pull us in. Once she was, we walked in and sat down. She pulled out wills files and put them in front of Joyce.
-"I have good news and bad news. The good news is that he's been doing better. he doesn't show any signs of being suicidal. Which brings me to the bad news, this might be very hard for you to take, so prepare yourself."
me and Joyce looked at each other.. oh god.
-"wills outbreaks and outbursts have shown signs of having symptoms of bipolar disorder."
-"what? He's only 16. He's so young.." Joyce said.
-"I know, it's very confusing for everyone. his random bursts of emotion have been one of the symptoms, his suicide was the outcome of one. That one time he stayed in bed for a few days was a major sign. we can prescribe medication for him, it would give a little weird side effects but it works with time." She explained.
-"what are the side effects?"
-"lack of energy, dizziness, nausea, personality changes. I know it sounds like a lot, but we've had very good feedback in the past."
Joyce looked at me with an unsure look. It honestly made sense that Will was bipolar, in my opinion, I thought he should take it. But I didn't say anything because it's not my choice.
-"look, we can let you sleep on it. He wouldn't need to take it until he's released. You have plenty of time to decide, no pressure."
-"thank you." Joyce said to her.
-"would you guys like to see him before leaving?" She asked the both of us, we both nodded and she sent him in.
when Will walked in, we instantly made eye contact. I could tell he wasn't expecting me there. He was so pale and had huge bags under his eyes. He didn't look better at all, he looked so different.
he looked like he wanted to cry when he saw me.
he sat down on the opposite side of the table and his mom smiled at him.
it was quiet between me and him, he kept on looking at me but neither one of us said anything. His mom talked to him for a few moments before noticing Will looking at me.
-"I'm going to leave you guys alone to say hi, I'll wait in the car Mike." She said, saying goodbye to Will.
as she walked out, Will looked to the ground.
-"I'm sorry, mike." he whimpered.
i looked up from my lap and he was crying. I stood up and walked over to hug him. I wrapped my arms around him as we both started to cry.
-"no, I'm sorry will. I really am, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I'm sorry for everything I did to you, I regret it. Will you please forgive me?" I said, with his head over my shoulder.
-"i forgive you, mike." He sniffled.
we both sat down and talked. It was a brief but non awkward kind of talk.
-"i was still really mad at you, but I guess even after I yelled at you to leave me alone, you would still come to see me. it's stupid, I know."
-"I didn't know if I would upset you, I didn't want to make things worse. But I wish I visited sooner."
He smiled at me, holding my hand. He checked the time from the clock behind me.
-"shit, I have to go." He stood up.
-"wait, will!" I stopped him from leaving right away.
-"I love you." I told him, for the first time ever.
The biggest smile appeared on his face, it made my heart melt. It was the sweetest thing ever.
-"I love you too, I'll see you soon." He hugged me tightly.
-"bye, Will." I waved as he left.
i was so relieved, we were both at peace. Now I just had to wait another 2 weeks to see him again. When he comes home. I cant wait, and we won't have to worry about school since it's summer break. Maybe this time will be different.
We can be more open to our friends about it.
i could not wait.
