On The Run | Wakasa I. (Tokyo Revengers)

Chapter 64: Accept

I froze in my place, not knowing what to do nor a word to say. Just by seeing him in front of me tempts me to land a punch on this man. Knowing who he is, I can't help but wonder how I'll react if it was Y/N standing in front of me now. Would I see him in her? Would I feel the same anger building up in me?

Different thoughts are messing up with my mind. I kept opening my mouth and close it as no voice came out of my throat. I don't know why but somehow, I feel speechless. I couldn't find the right wordsto say. I wanted to say 'yes' but I just couldn't. Why? What's stopping me? Is it because of my doubts?? Am I doubting her?? Or am I doubting myself? Again.

Why?

Just why can't I decide whenever I have to??

Why can't I even say a single word for Y/N?

Why??

Mom...

"I see." My throat went dry when he spoke again after a minute of silence in waiting for my response. But there was none. I replied nothing but silence because I couldn't even bring myself to face it. If only I could turn a blind eye to it. I can't help but worry how I'll feel if I see her. That bitter feeling within me will for sure show, considering my past. "Your silence is enough for me to understand." I bite my lip when he gave me a look of disappointment, clearly expecting me to do something else.

He straightened up and fixed his posture as he looked at me with his forehead up with pride.

"That is all I came here for. I'll be leaving now." He started to walk near me probably to pass me by to the door.

Every step he took felt so heavy and it's as if everything is happening in a very slow motion. My chest is tightening, knowing he'll stick to his words and will probably never let me know of Y/N's location. I feel so confused right now. My mind is messed up. I can't even think straight. It's like my thoughts are being divided as well as my emotions. I want to see her at the same time, I don't due to my fear.

Fear...

Is that it?

Am I getting scared again?

As soon as that thought crossed my mind, another memory of my past flashed in my mind.

I can still remember how it felt. My surroundings are so loud yet I can't hear a thing nor understand anything. The heat coming from the huge fire creeping onto my skin. Tears that fell from my eyes nonstop as I watch my home being destroyed by that hellish fire in that unfortunate night.

My ears were blocked at that time but I was sure I heard someone yelling.

In front of me, there was a girl.

Crying.

She was shouting in an inaudible voice as it was muffled by her cries. She was desperately stretching out her arm as if she wanted to reach for the burning house. Two men were holding her back to prevent her from going as she struggled from their grip to push through the crowd as if she can do anything about the fire.

My surname.

It was the first thing I heard from her indistinct shouts. But it wasn't me she's calling for. She was calling for someone else as she broke into tears continuously, not minding her surroundings. She was calling for her desperately as if she was her own mother.