Tyler Joseph Imagines

Awful, Terrible Dream

I had a dream last night.

It was not as good as I would have liked it to be.

You seemed to like me in the beginning. You invited me to one of your vacations. You seemed excited to see me at first.

Of course, I wasn't the only one you invited. If you just invited me, that would be awkward wouldn't it? Inviting a girl to a family vacation, desperately trying to convince your grandma 'we're only friends'. That's exhausting. Isn't it? I can tell it is for you.

That's okay. It doesn't have to be so complicated. Are we really just friends?

Of course we are. Friends hold hands in the back seats on long car rides. Friends kiss each other's foreheads while one is 'asleep'.

I wasn't asleep, I felt your warm lips on my eyebrow. I felt your fingers running through my hair. I felt you jerk back when I moved the slightest movement.

We are only friends. Friends hug each other, and cuddle each other.

But friends do not invite each other on family vacations alone. There must be a friend group to repel suspicion. But we both know what's really going on. Don't we?

You invited Josh. You invited Debby. You invited Mark, Brendon. But you invited me first. You called me. No one else was worth a call. Only a simple text in our group chat would do for them, but you called me.

I really thought you liked me. You like me, right?

I had a dream.

It was perfect in the beginning.

But once I got to your hotel, with the others, it was not so perfect anymore.

Who was she?

The blonde in the Red bikini. Her perfect straight teeth, blue eyes, perfect thick hair. She was hanging all over you. Just like I do when we are together.

Why did she take my spot next to you on the couch? Why did she smile brightly when you looked over at her? Why did your mouth curl when she whispered something to you?

Are you only friends with her too?

The day seemed to go by slow, but I couldn't tell you anything that happened besides when she would smile at you. Every passing minute I saw her beautiful white teeth.

This is not even the bad part of the dream. I haven't got to the worst part yet. Would you like to hear it?

You all decided to go down to the pool, play some board games on one of the outside tables. I stayed in the hotel. Can you guess why?

I couldn't stand seeing her. I couldn't stand seeing you with her.

At some point, I don't remember when, I decided to go downstairs. Dreams happen so fast, it was almost an instant I decided I would go down to the pool and try to ignore your new friend and not waste my time in the hotel room. That is not why I came here. I came here to spend time with my friends.

When I got downstairs is when the dream got worse. It got way worse.

We don't have enough room in this game for you now that Tyler has a girl. It's better if you went upstairs. Brendon said to me.

She is a lot better at this game than you, thank god she showed up. Josh added.

You should just go back upstairs. Go to sleep or something. Debby said.

They all began to laugh. I felt nothing at all, not one single bit of sadness. I am used to it after all. They always tease me. That's why I always stick with you, did you know that? You are the only one who doesn't. You are the only one who genuinely cares for me. And I truly believed it.

Not until I looked over at you. You were laughing too.

Your head fell back, your mouth opened, and your chest lifted as laughs erupted from you. Your friend had her arm rested on your shoulder as she leaned over laughing.

That's when my eyes welled up with tears, and that's when I felt my heart drop to my stomach. You were just as involved in this as they were. You didn't care for me. Did you ever truly care for me?

I turned around quickly and rushed back into the hotel room. It was a terrible, awful dream.

I couldn't even make it up the hotel stairs. I stopped on the second step.

I sat there, my eyes blurred and my nose runny.

It felt so real, do you know that? I genuinely felt alone. At that point, I had no one. No one cared for me. All I felt was my heart beating, it felt so close to my skin yet so far away. For a split second I even imagined my heart in an endless void of darkness, pumping rhythmically, and quickly. And it was almost as if each beat, my heart was growing smaller. However, in my chest it felt like it was growing bigger. It felt tight in my chest, so tight that I had to push it out my mouth.

That's when the sobs came. It echoed all throughout the stairwell, bouncing around the concrete walls and right back into my ears.

Do you think this is the worst part? The dream couldn't possibly get any worse, right Ty?

I thought that as well as I sucked in my breath, and tried to calm myself down.

However, the dream wasn't over. In fact, it wasn't even that bad compared to what came next. Can you guess what came next?

I'm sure what you would like to guess is you came into the stairwell and apologized. You would give me a reasonable explanation for the woman you were with. You would possibly even tell me you loved me, and it will never happen again.

I would like that to be the case too, but that's not what happened.

Well, you did come into the stairwell room. You saw me sitting on those steps and you did apologize.

"I am so sorry for what they said out there. They are jerks." You said

You expected me to feel better after that, but seeing you only made my crying harder to control. Somehow I managed to yelp "then why didn't you tell them to stop?"

After I said this, I took a deep breath and forced myself to cry silently. I wanted to know your answer, because I really did think you would comfort me. You always comfort me.

Through my blurry eyes I could see your sad expression, I could see you tilt your head down, and shift your vans onto the concrete floor.

"Well..." you started, "I guess I don't care that much."

Awful, terrible dream. Awful, awful.

That's really why I woke up in a panic. Sobbing, sweating, and panting.

I know that girl is not real. I know what you said is only a dream. But it was an awful, awful dream.

One not so easy to forget.

<コ:彡

Based on a dream I actually had. The dream is really, REALLY hard to forget cuz I had that dream like two years ago. All good tho lmao.

~ M.I.N.E.

P.S. sorry I don't write as much anymore. I see it as a chore most of the time... but sometimes, like tonight, I just couldn't help but write.