Aristotle
Love was pain.
I knew exactly what that meant.
One moment you could be falling peacefully, then the next, you were drowning in a sea of feelings and thoughts. A storm brewed and there was no way out.
One moment our souls were dancing to the song of which our heartbeats created the music, the world was quiet. The next, the noise grew louder and louder and our little world broke and we were slipping away. Pieces and fragments scattered everywhere. It was a tragedy, and not a fairytale anymore.
Staring at him, it felt like my heart got ripped out of my chest. The ache replaced the warmth from moments ago.
We were laughing together like everything was okay. Like I didn't just cry in my bathroom and let him hold me as I fell apart.
"Why do you smell like someone's perfume?" I asked again, my voice cracked and wavered, filled with hurt. Sending another piece breaking off of my heart, that was laying in his hands, getting crushed and crushed until it had nothing left to break.
He was out late. At a party. That was it. I trusted him and he would never... He would never do that to me, right? I loved him too much to think he was capable of something so terrible. I didn't want to believe it but the voices grew louder and I couldn't think properly.
Perhaps I should've done more. Instead of making it all about myself and bottling everything up. Carrying the burdens and sitting in the mess my dad created. Perhaps my love wasn't enough. Or maybe I was being dramatic again. I always tended to feel too much.
He stood there, expression blank. Confusion flashed in his eyes for a brief moment before a frown crossed his features. "Ari, I didn't," his voice faltered, disbelief evident in his tone, knowing exactly what I implied.
I felt terrible for even thinking for a second he could do such a thing. I loved him so much, it hurt. But everything was right there. He was busy earlier and I probably caught him at a bad time. He was annoyed, hung up and then had to come see me.
I pursed my lips, looking up at him with hope in my eyes. "Please tell me I'm wrong," I whispered, trying everything I could to stop the crack in my voice.
"Baby," he spoke, kneeling down in front of me, taking my hands in his. It took everything in me to not break down right here in front of him. And yet, tears spilled.
This couldn't be happening.
Was I being too distant? He was going through his own things and I was so caught up in my life. Blinded by selfishness, when he needed someone. And I guess she was there. Images after images of him flooded my mind like a tsunami.
Even if this wasn't true, I always ended up breaking my own heart.
"I didn't do anything," he said.
"Then why?"
I felt dumb for believing my own thoughts before he got the chance to explain but I couldn't help it. His hair was messy, his clothes disheveled. He smelled like her perfume.
What was I supposed to think?
He cupped my face, looking into my eyes. I shook my head, tears streaming down my face. I felt so helpless.
All this stuff with my dad and now this. I wanted everything to go away. I wanted the noise to silence, the pain to stop. I wanted it to be a lie.
"I love you," he said, searching my eyes for something. But I looked away. Unable to deal with this.
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Love, Aristotle
Романтика{ Previously known as Star Shopping} She fell too hard and he couldn't catch her. But when he was ready, she was already slipping away. She had enough of his cold embrace, lame excuses, empty promises and decided she needed to walk away, but that d...
