When Tomorrow Never Came

chapter 4

So before I start this chapter there is a trigger warning at the end of this chapter  and in the next there a miscarriage. This is something that has hit me hard in my life and so I did write it inaccurate to my experience but similar to a friend who also experienced a miscarriage because just like our lives we will experience things differently. Please share a hug to anyone you know that has experienced a miscarriage  or just be kind to everyone because you never know what they are going through and remember 1 out of 4 women experience a miscarriage.

Chapter 4

Over the next five weeks Joseph and I  were sending a secret letter to each other practically daily through his uncle Broshck. Any time we'd see each other in person we'd exchange glances and little touches. At Lily's wedding she had us dance together where Joseph whispered I love you, in my ear for the first time. We would even share a couple more dinners at my apartment with little kisses and dancing to the radio. 

On the 6th week I found out we would be on leave at the same time before shipping out. During one of our dinners he invited me to meet his family. I happily agreed and we left the next morning for Cambridge together.

 "Any important information I should know before I meet your family?" I asked as we began to drive away.

Joseph thought for a minute. "My mother has always been able to tell whether you're lying or not, so just tell her the truth," he replied. "That won't be hard, I'm great at being painfully hone-" I paused. "Joseph what if she asks about... if we've... " I started to panic "She'll be so irate.. and you're her son... how could I have been so selfish I just ruined your relationship with your parents..." I went on Joseph grabbed my hand

 "you didn't ruin anything, Miriam. We both made that decision. Together. You shouldn't think the worse" he tried to assure me. I scooted closer to him and rested my head on his shoulder deciding to trust him. 

After a short while I started to feel sick I tried closing one of my eyes tight to help keep from getting dizzy

"Are you alright honey? you look white as a ghost and your eye is clenched shut." He noticed i shook my head 

"I must have worried myself sick," I lied, knowing damned well it was morning sickness " I'll just open the window. That should help" I said as I rolled the window partly down. The fresh air felt refreshing, "you know when I was a kid I used to get motion sickness, something awful! I guess I haven't outgrown it like I thought" I admitted. 

"You know my mom used to feed me lemon slices while we'd drive down the road and those used to help with what motion sickness I had when I was a kid" Joseph reminisced we can stop at the supermarket that should be in about 3 miles and get you some" he offered I smiled

 " you're quite the gentleman Joseph Turner," I beamed. He smiled and reached for my hand, I kept thinking I could tell him now every minute but something didn't feel right. 

After finding some lemons we were on the road again with only 15 miles to go. Thankfully the lemons helped and I was able to ignore the sick feeling.

"Radio, motion pictures, or books" I asked Turner trying to fill the silence with a conversation instead of my own thoughts

"Hmmmm the only motion pictures I've really seen were the training ones through the army so that's out... with the radio I can at least use it as background noise on some nights... but books... books I can really drift away from the world... I prefer books." he glanced at me" I'd ask what you prefer but I've already noticed you're quite fond of that radio of yours" he teased

"you're too observant" I laughed

"What is your biggest dream" he asked

"Oh  I'm glad you asked last night I dreamt I was trying to ride a unicycle that could sing" I started in jest knowing he meant goals. Joseph raised and eyebrow at me with a smirk
" It's not very big I'm afraid, just A little house with a little fence with a little tree and a little swing. there'd be a covered porch on the front long enough we could sit outside on a hot summer evening and sip some tea. just you and me and any children we have." I enlightened