Tell Them This When I Die

An Anonymous Source Named Nikolas

Adam pulls in next to the SUV, getting out. Daphne's present is in the trunk, so he wrenches it out before he bursts through the door.

Sarah is perched on the end of the couch, watching Daphne and her friends open presents. She glances at Adam as he opens the door, then gets up and walks over to him.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry, Sarah—"

"It's okay, Adam. As long as you're here."

But Sarah knows. Sarah knows because Adam has that look to him, the messy-haired, frantic look he has when he's done something wrong. And the buttons on his shirt have been buttoned all wrong.

"I'm sorry," he breathes, and now he's not apologizing for being late.

"It's okay, Adam," she says. She reaches out and re-buttons his shirt properly.

"Sarah—"

"It's okay, Adam," she repeats. "We didn't agree on anything."

Sarah is falling apart. She's shattering into a million pieces. She wasn't good enough. She didn't have that confidence, that excitement. Four days? That's how long she kept him interested?

She wants to ask who it was. Some random girl at a bar or someone he's been seeing before her. She really wants to know, but she doesn't ask. She takes the present from him, smoothens out his hair, and leads him over to Daphne

Adam has calmed his breathing. She's upset; she's feeling self-conscious, not good enough. He can see that clearly. He'll fix that.

They don't speak to each other for the next few hours. Adam cleans up the wrapping paper, says goodbye to the other parents. He checks on Daphne, playing in the living room with a stuffed version of Neptune.

"You get that for her?" Adam asks Sarah, who is cleaning sprinkles off the counter.

She nods. "I thought she'd like it."

Adam knew Daphne liked the planets, Neptune in particular, but he didn't know that Sarah even knew what planet Neptune was.

"Sarah—" he starts, but his phone begins to vibrate. Adam glances at it. It's Wilkes. "Sorry, I have to—" He cuts himself off, walking into the hallway.

"Hello?"

"Hughey, you've fucked yourself."

Adam checks the contact. The evening sun is pouring through the window, making it hard for him to see who it is. After second glance, it's definitely Wilkes.

"Sergeant Wilkes? What's going on?"

"Have you looked at the news, Adam? Have you even bothered to look at the shitstorm you've caused?"

Adam's heart is racing. "What news?"

"You fucked her, Hughey? Are you serious?"

Adam blinks. "You—you're not talking about—"

"Our famous little drug mule? Damn right. Headlines, Hughey, big headlines."

"What headlines?" Adam puts the phone on speaker, then brings up the news. Scrolls to the first article. "Oh, god," he breathes.

"That's right, Hughey. An anonymous witness saw you leaving the Nyx complex this morning. The media's eating this shit up—the personable criminal and her doe-eyed cop. After the buy incident, Adam, this shit is big. They're romanticizing the shit out of dealing drugs."

Adam covers his mouth with his hand. Nikolas saw him; Nikolas is dating Eris. Nikolas is mad; Nikolas calls the media.

"I can't deal with this internally, Adam," Wilkes is saying. "They're talking termination."