don't get too attached - matt sturniolo

chapter twelve

he didn’t hate me. that was the basis of our relationship now, but it was a thought i carried around with no small amount of contentment. he seemed to accept me after our stint of television together, brushing shoulders (and not looking blatantly disgusted) when i walked with them and offering me bottles of water or snacks from their kitchen. he still wouldn’t talk to me directly, but it didn’t seem like death incarnate when i responded to his comments during lunch.

“he’s warming up to you,” nick murmured next to me in class, failing to conceal the fact that he was copying my last night’s homework directly. normally i would be at their house getting the work done, but i had to make sure my dad had food at home (he didn’t. he only complained that i didn’t make his favorite meal). i swatted his shoulder, but he only leaned in further, snickering when i complained.

“is he?” i asked, the confirmation causing a small pool of heat in my stomach. the fact that it wasn’t just in my own head, that others had seen his new attitude towards me, had me smiling as i finally relented and allowed nick to swipe my paper.

“hey, you forgot this.” a voice called from the door as footsteps sounded towards nick and i. i lifted my eyes to see matt holding a case of what i assumed to be earbuds. he was wearing an emerald green bomber jacket over a simple black t-shirt, and his hair was framing his eyes in soft waves, not washed out by the flurouscents like everyone else. he looked lighter than ususal, the permanent crease between his brows absent for the moment. he looked…good. the warmth in my stomach churned a tad as i busied myself in setting out my pencils.

just because he didn’t hate me didn’t mean that things had changed that drastically, and i shouldn’t be feeling any different either.

“thanks matty,” nick chimed, shooting me a suggestive grin, which i struggled to ignore.

matt shrugged and headed towards the door, then stopped and turned with what seemed like a fair amount of mental effort. we made eye contact, and he gave me a small wave with the most miniscule tilt of his lips. a small jolt of not-unpleasant surprise shot down my spine, and i wouldn’t have been startled to find my jaw on the floor.

“oh boy,” nick said, beaming without restraint. i narrowed my eyes, a retort on my tongue. but the words were jumbled in delivery.

“it’s not- we didn’t- i’m not- and he isn’t-” i started and stopped, fumbling over the message that there was nothing going on between us.

“uh huh,” he nodded, though the crinkle at the corners of his eyes remained. i sighed and focused on my work, fighting against the urge to hit nick again as he chuckled and finished copying my homework.

-----

when i was sitting with the boys at lunch, my nerves were sending out constant twinges of awareness that matt was sitting across from me and not angled away from my presence. he was listening to my words and not dismissing them outright. he was paying attention to me, and the recognition had me reeling. he had taken his jacket off, and my eyes, for some reason, were drawn to his previously obstructed upper arms, leading me to swallow tightly when he shifted and the material of his shirt tugged against the skin.

“you okay, (y/n)?” chris asked. i nodded mutely, forcing myself to look at the tray in front of me.

“oh, she’s fine,” nick said, and i could just hear the smug smile in his voice. chris tilted his head but shrugged.

“you coming over tonight?” he asked, smacking his fork wetly against the school’s questionable mac and cheese while the rest of us looked on in disgust.

“i mean, if you want,” i replied, and my gaze slid to matt of their own accord. nick and chris had apparently had the same idea, as he now looked uncomfortable being put on the spot. his eyes darted to me and then to his food.

“yeah, sure. come over, i guess.”

-----

the tension in my chest remained with me for the rest of the day, but it wasn’t disturbing or a need for concern. it was a reminder that he didn’t hate me.

and even though it sounded like the bare minimum, it still had the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end as i came through the front door.