Hoping [h.s.]

Yonder | Epilogue I.

song for this chapter:
Places We Won't Walk - Bruno Major
(link added if you'd like to listen while reading!)
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January 7
(6 months later)

Jarelle

Entry #18
January 7th, 2018

Green.

A color, a pigment that planted itself in the deepest hollow of my heart with no intention of ever leaving.

It's been hard to not compare the stars' glimmer to the shine of your smile, one that I find myself staring a little longer at the mirror in hopes to find it right next to me when I flutter my eyes open time and time again to try and see it shining right at me.

Our story is one that found home in these discolored pages and I refuse to burn, no matter how crestfallen its end became.

I've grown to be fond of sad endings, ours at least. Though I wouldn't call it sad in the least, and I find myself laughing at times imagining you scolding me for thinking so and would correct me to believe it wasn't.

The way I see it, you're still at the other end of the tunnel casting a guiding light over us so we don't get lost along the way.

I can still feel the gentle touch of your fingertips tracing the ink embedded in my skin, your lips leaving a trail of damp reminders of your presence in their wake.

And the Moon, oh, the Moon.

The Moon spends each night longing for the moment it'll embrace its lover again halfway somehow, someday.

The stars have become witnesses to this disgrace, pulling the strings that hold them hostage in hopes that one day their polar opposite climates kiss under the same sky.

You once mentioned how you never wanted a know a world without me in it, but did you ever think about how we'd still be sharing the same dancing clouds however long our hearts desire it?

Just like we swayed our bodies under the moonlight near the fire escape, only this time, it's our turn to admire them instead of the other way around.

I remember how the Sun kissed your skin ever so delicately, leaving the most perfect remnant of developing freckles in their wake.

The fire escape still holds your shadow, hoping that one day you'll fill the missing spot and bring your optimistic perspective along with it.

I didn't miss how you left an old journal behind, I'll read the old entries about your view of our time together as a token of your devoted love and everlasting care.

I don't wanna know an all consuming love that isn't yours.

Did I ever tell you the exact moment I felt the unmistakable spark of enamor sneak its way into my soul?

I felt it when you'd wake me up with a continent's worth of kisses being littered over every inch of my skin, making sure to not leave any spot unforgotten.

I felt it when we'd walk down the sidewalk and your hand would reach out for me to hold whenever it'd get too crowded or I'd be a bit behind from your long strides.