Never Gonna Happen

14

"Scooter I-"

"Owen fucking Reynolds? That's who you're fucking nowadays?"

I grab Scooter's arm, trying to move him away from Owen's door, "Scooter, please, just move. Can we talk somewhere else?"

Scooter shakes me off, running his hand through his hair as he scoffs down at me. His eyes glance down from my face to my neck, he reaches out and pulls the neckline of my shirt down, "Jess, please don't tell me that Owen is the kid you fucked the night that you did the party." Scooter practically begs.

"Scott..."

His face contorts and then scrunches back up, the anger still evident on his face. He gives me a fake smile, "Goodnight." and then he turns around and walks away from me.

I stand there and watch him walk away, "Why does it matter?" I yell at him before he manages to turn the corner and leave me alone.

He pauses, turns around, and shakes his head slowly, "I guess it doesn't, not anymore."

"Scott!" I yell as he leaves me. I drop down and grab at the roots of my hair, "Fuck!"

I can feel the tears heat my eyes up and I try to blink them away, I just feel the trails they burn down my face and I stand up.

I stumble around the hallways, trying to find a bathroom. When I find one, I see a couple sitting on the toilet making out, "Get the fuck out." I order them. The girl flips me off, "Get the fuck off his lap and get the fuck out."

They break apart and the girl looks over at me and rolls her eyes before standing up and leading the boy out after her. I close the door and lock it, I look at myself in the mirror and run the sink, "Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck."

I get a washcloth and run it under the water, the cold water biting at my hand. I wash my face and look at myself in the mirror again. I take a few shaky breaths, "You did nothing wrong." I comfort myself. I take one deep breath and then force myself out of the bathroom.

I make my way downstairs, not trying to rejoin the party, but to just get out.

The bodies start to suffocate me and I look around, trying to find anyway out of this hellhole. I wanna scream.

I need to find Scott.

I force my way to a wall, I stand on my toes as I look around, trying to find my tall friend. When I finally see him, he's downing a bottle of something. I'm too far away to see what it is, but I doubt it's lemonade.

Knowing I don't have any other ride home, I leave the party and make my way to Scooter's car. I reach for the door handle and when I pull it, it stays shut.

"Fucking fuck."

I sit down on the sidewalk, the car holding me up. I wrap my arms around me. If I had known that I'd be sitting in the freezing cold waiting for my designated driver, who's getting drunk, I'd have brought a jacket.

By the time the party was dying down, I had wrapped myself into a sitting fetal position; trying to keep myself warm. That plan wasn't working too well. I was so cold it felt like my tits had fallen off.

"What are you doing?"

I look up to see Scooter staring down at me, "Waiting for you, fuckface."

The clearly drunken Scooter looks like he's trying to figure out why, "Why?"

"You're my ride home."

Scooter giggles as he leans on his car, "I don't think I can drive very well right now."

I stand up and extend my hand to him, "Keys." Scooter stares at me with a blank face. I sigh and reach into his left pocket, the one he always puts his keys in.

"Hey, woah. I don't think my girlfriend would be ok with you doing that."

"You don't have a girlfriend, you fucking idiot."

Scooter pauses and laughs a short laugh as I unlock the car, "Oh, yeah."

"Get in the car."

"Yes ma'am."

The entire drive home consists of Scooter singing, more so yelling, lyrics to random songs on the radio.

I pull into the school parking lot and slam the door behind me as I get out. Scooter's slumped against his door. I open it and he slides down it as it moves away from him. He jolts up and looks up at me, smiling, "Hi."

"Hi, honey. Wanna get out of the car for me?"

Scooter gets out of the car and tilts his head, looking at me, "Are you mad at me?" he asks.

I shake my head no, "No, you're mad at me."

"Oh, yeah. You fucked Owen."

"Twice."

"Twice. You know, you're really not helping yourself." Scooter says as he slings his arm around my shoulders, putting the majority of his body weight on me.

"Yeah, I know." I lead him to his dorm room. Since I still have his keys, I unlock it and pull Scooter into his room. I set him on his bed and set down his keys on his nightstand. He turns over on his bed and snuggles into his pillow.

I pull his arm so he turns towards me, "What?" he slurs as he slowly blinks at me.

"You need to take off your clothes."

His eyes widen and a smile spreads on his face as he looks at me, "Are we going to fuck again?"

I sigh, "No, you're drunk and you're going to bed. Do you sleep with your shoes and jeans on?" Scooter shakes his head no, "Exactly. Take off your clothes." Scooter slowly tugs off his shoes and shirt and the rest of his clothes. I stop him before he gets fully naked, "Nope, you don't sleep fully naked either."

Scooter groans and then leans back into his bed, pulling his covers over him, "I'm still mad at you."

"I know."

"Why would you do that?"

"Sleep with Owen?" Scooter nods, "I don't know, we were both drunk. Seemed like a good idea to drunk me. It's not like I had it preplanned to sleep with him. I didn't even know that it was his party."

Scooter's silent for a moment, so I stand up and move towards his door to leave, thinking he fell asleep, "But, what about me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why didn't you choose me?"

I blink and stare at him, "Choose you?"

I hear Scooter shuffle and I see his figure sit up from his bed, "I would've chosen you."

"Scott, I'm...I'm like really confused right now."

"I thought, that since we slept together, you had feelings for me. I thought that that was what that meant." Scooter's voice sounds less light as he starts to get more serious.

"What? Scooter, we were drunk."

"Drunk words are sober thoughts."

"I'm still confused, what are you saying?"

I can practically hear my heart pounding in my chest as we both stare at each other through the darkness. The silence is starting to feel like it's suffocating me.

"I'm saying, that I'm in love with you Jess." Scooter says it with a matter of fact tone.

"What? Scott, you can't-you can't say that."

"Why not?"

"I...I don't...you just can't."

"You don't love me?"

"Scott-"

"You don't love me?"

"Scott...I'm, I need...You're drunk. I need to go."

"Jess..."

"Goodnight Scooter."

And I leave.