Star Wars: Light & Dark Rising

14. The Crystal Is The Heart Of The Blade

Still absolute silence from Jim.

"She... She told me to run. I wouldn't listen. I tried helping her, but she wouldn't let me. She had forced me down the steps with a push of the Force. It felt like a mountain... Zoe was scared of her. But there were too many clones, she was losing her energy, and I wasn't fast enough. Zoe couldn't best her, but distracted her so the clones could fire. The shots weakened her, and Zoe forced her to fall onto her knees... And finally..." Jake couldn't bring himself to finish it.

He looked at his brother, and for the first time in Jake's life, he saw emotion, raw and pure, in Jim's eyes. Jim likely couldn't contain it, not this time like years ago.

"I felt it in the Force. I was terrified afterwards, I didn't have it in me to run up to Zoe and fight her. Not after seeing that. So I ran. And eventually ran into Daini. As much as she annoys me, your Mandalorian saved me that day. I couldn't handle it, I couldn't handle anything after Ell..." Jake says, adding it all quietly. Jim looked to be thinking before Jim finally opened his mouth though in a very somber tone.

"What way... Beheaded? Impaled? Tortured? Shot at?" Jim asks, and there was unmistakable cracks in his voice, but now he was looking away from Jake to hide his own face.

"Im.. Impaled." Jake says, "At least it was relatively quick."

"She died heroically. Like a true Jedi." Jim says, probably trying to ease the pain to himself though it obviously wasn't working. Jake could see Jim's hand slightly shaking and constant blinking in an effort to conceal his reaction. After a moment's silence, Jim says, "Thank you."

A part of Jake was surprised. He had expected Jim to blame him that his master died. But like the perfect Jedi he is, such grudges are moot. Forgiveness is his way. Or perhaps he is glad that even though he almost lost his aunt and brother, he still has his brother. Especially because he knows absolutely nothing on his sisters whereabouts.

"You know," Jim said, almost with a chuckle in a failing attempt to humor himself, "I never understood what she was trying to teach me. When I'd get praises from Master Windu, I'd get scoldings from her. 'Think for yourself', she'd always said. 'Even small things such as those are important'. I never quite understood. Even now, I'm not sure I understand how to follow it."

Jake's mind goes back to the admitance of her master, and despite how close any of them got with their aunt, a part of him felt he didn't know enough about her life. They knew her as a person, and specific tidbits of her past, but nothing really specific of her life. He could tell she held a resentment and regret when it came to her brother, Jake and Jim's father, but he had wished to know more about the falling out. About her relationship with his father, about his father in general.

He was hardly a toddler when their father left for reasons neither of the brothers knew. And their father had likely gotten killed. There was a chance that he is still alive, there is even a chance he is also force sensitive like Ell and the siblings. But Jake never had the time to search for him, and Jim never had the care. Jake always felt more curious about their father, partially because that's the only parent he shares with the rest of his siblings, and partially because he was so young when his father left. Jim likely still has a couple memories of their father, Jim could probably recognzie his face if he saw him again, but Jake could walk right past his own father and never know it was him.

But then there is the chance that their father is simply a deadbeat.

With Jim and Jake's luck, their father probably was.

"Perhaps one day we'll know what her own childhood was like." Jake says, "And maybe our youth will make more sense."

Both brothers inhale, though the old air hardly gave them any comfort. Jake wanted to move the conversation along, in hopes to change the topic. Jim likely could tell by Jake's silence, and so he stays quiet for several minutes before he lets out a deep breath.