Soudam oneshots

💗 Fell for you 💗

So uh I'll always do lil A/N at the end, maybe not
always at the start but yk, just so you know :)

Apologies in advance for any spelling errors/autocorrect

TW: Self harm
Angst with fluffy ending
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3rd person POV

Kazuichi dropped the razor abruptly, he glared his own arm covered in intentional cuts and scratches.
Pathetic..
Kazuichi thought as more tears overflowed at the corners of his eyes.
Kazuichi sat on his bed, crying while hugging a pillow, he genuinely forgot why he was crying he just let his emotions take over like always, why was he like this , he didn't wanna be like this, why why why why--

Ding!

A notification sound came from his phone, abruptly snapping him out of his emotional daze. He reached for his phone and grabbed it off the night stand it was a message from his best friend, Gundham Tanaka

Gundham 💗
You seemed distressed today, Is something the matter?

Kaz stared at the screen reading it over and over, he genuinely had no clue what to say to that, if he told the truth he'd probably just get some stupid stereotypical comfort statements
He's doing his best to check in on me..
Kazuichi let out a slight smile in realization. He finally decided to reply

'Uhm..yes actually, I don't know I'm just ya know..out of it'

Kaz honestly wanted any sort of comfort even if it was all empty, he yearned for any type of comfort. After a minute or two kazuichi checked his messages

Read

"Wh- what?.."

It's like kazuichis world shattered, the only person who seemed to actually care just left him on read and wasn't even online anymore
"This..is just a joke..right?.."
Kazuichis mind went every place possible, why did he check in on him if he didn't care? Did he do it just because? He aggressively tangled his hair in-between his fingers, Chest heaving from all the emotions that hit him at once as kazuichis widened and tear-filled eyes stared in horror at the screen, he dropped his phone, sick of looking at it, hugged his knees and sobbed.

Knock knock

Kazuichi looked up, wondering who could be here at--kaz checked his phone--12:53 at night, Kaz instinctively wiped his tears and sucked it up before shouting "Come in!"

And there he was, with a gust of air from the door opening, Gundham stood looking fairly more natural then usual, no makeup, hair messy, his jacket and scarf nowhere to be seen "Are you alright?!" They expressed, closing the door behind him and running up to Kaz "Ah-uhm!.." Kazuichi blurted, very startled by the sudden burst of movement in his vicinity and Gundhams entrance "Ahem..ah my apologies I overwhelmed your senses didn't I?" Gundham sat next to Kaz, setting a bag down next to the bed "Uh, yeah but it's ok" kazuichi rested his head onto his arms which were hugging his knees "You seem rather calm, didn't you express discomfort in your reply?" Gundham questioned, referring to the messages they had exchanged earlier "Oh uhm well I didn't think you'd come to my place so I thought you were someone else so uh I kinda just sucked it up ya know?" Kazu spoke in a quiet, low tone. Gundham raised his hand up to hover over Kazs face, which had a confused look until Gundham mouthed 'May I?' Kaz nodded as Gundham placed his hand to cup kazuichis face, inspecting it throughly "you do know it's ok right?.." Kazuichi tilted his head in confusion "It's ok to show weakness, there is nothing shameful about crying in front of others..If you need to, let it out.." Kazuichi began to fidget with his fingers, bending them back and forth "I'm here, nobody's gonna hurt you when im here" kazuichis breathing got more shallow looking at his knees and like a final act Gundham pulled him into a loving hug and just like that kazuichis widened eyes overflowed with tears, all his emotions hitting him hard all at once.

...

Kazuichi was bawling into Gundhams shoulder, clawing at his back as if Gundham was gonna let him out of the embrace that started this. Gundham gently rubbed circles into Kazs back while Kaz cried until there was nothing left. "Sorry, but it's not healthy to suppress emotions" Gundham apologized, he didn't want Kaz to bottle up his emotions cause it's so much worse than crying when you feel like it, its less overwhelming.

Eventually Kaz detached himself from Gundham, while wiping away all the gross fluids coming from his face while Gundham looked around and spotted a tissue box close by, taking it and giving it to kazuichi. "*snif* ..thanks.." kazuichi said slowly "Did that make you feel any better?" Gundham questioned "mhmm....thanks " kazuichi replied, smiling a little Gundham smiled back until they noticed something, while Kazuichi was wiping his face he caught a glimpse of his inner arm,fresh cuts scattered all over it Kazuichi didn't seem to notice his scars were clear in Gundhams view. "Kazuichi may I see your arm?" Kazuichi immediately picked up that Gundham knew about the cuts and complied, hold his arms into Gundhams view, tears pricking his eyes again as he looked away. "It's ok kazuichi, there's no need to feel ashamed, I'll help you with your battle scars ok?" Kaz hummed in response facing Gundham again, tears coming down his soft cheeks.

Gundham took his bag they had set down earlier and pulled out some bandages and a began wrapping it around Kazs arm slowly, occasionally looking up at Kaz to see if it hurt "I know this may be shameful for you but it's alright, it's ok to make mistakes like this, just try your best to fix it ok?" Gundham did his best to comfort the other, finishing up bandaging one arm "..so-um...where'd you get the bandages in the first place?" Kazuichi questioned, warm tears pouring down his cheeks, he still has some feelings to spill even after all that crying he did "The mortal skilled in the art of healing had blessed me with several tools to help me treat myself, I am truly grateful for their sacrifice of material for my own well being" Gundhams god persona shown through strongly again Kazuichi chuckled at it while Gundham finished with the final arm "So Mikan gave you these?" The other nodded " Well it is safe to say.." Gundham started to put away the materials as he spoke "..you have been healed, may the art of protection be sealed in that capsule around your forearm" Gundham declared, seemingly making it official that Kazuichis arm was finished kazuichi started giggling at the way Gundham spoke again, he couldn't help it, he was so confident in the funny way of saying regular things.

"Y'know the way you talk is kinda cute heheh ♡"
Kazuichi said in-between soft laughter, a light blush spreading on both boys faces "oh-so you..ah..really now hm?" Gundham stuttered trying to keep his persona and instead just hid his face in his hands
Kazuichi chuckled at Gundham shying away

And then it hit him

He was completely in love with him, his friend Gundham Tanaka is someone he couldn't live without. He wanted to stare at his pretty face forever, he wanted to be with him for the rest of his life.
He loved him.

With his new discovery he looked at Gundham in a new and clearer light, he saw someone he could depend on and someone he'd never let go of.
Gundham had calmed himself down by now and slowly asked " Do you find my face intriguing Kazuichi? You do seem to be staring" "oh-uhm yes?- I mean!- sorry!-uh-" kazuichi slurred his words together and ended up saying a mixture of responses "Keheh, do  not panic, I do not mind you staring" Gundham quietly said, staring right back at kazuichi. Both of them smiled at each other, something new sprouting between them.

..
"So yeah that's the exact moment I knew I was in love with you ♡"

[End]
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A/N:
1417 words
Hii! Hopefully you enjoyed this, this was originally an idea based of off my experience with sh, Ive been sorta clean for a while so that's good, either way during writing I got a request similar to this so that was fun I might do a Gundham verison of this so look for that soon, anyway see ya in another oneshot :]