University Days: Season Four (Alternate Ending)

Semester Startover

Emily should've been sitting in front of me, giving me another dumb cheesy speech about "rocking" these classes. Instead I was a snot-dripping anxious mess of the girl my sister might've remembered.

I managed to keep it together for the most part, not allowing myself to go into full-blown crying and sobbing during the class. The professor didn't call on me, probably too afraid to deal with an emotional student like me.

The next class went almost similarly, except for the fact that I actually missed my name during roll call.

Throughout the entirety of the class, I'd been tearfully panicking about how I would justify my silence when my name was called.

At the end of class, I shakily made my way up to the professor, trying to regulate my breathing like Emily had always helped me do.

"Hi," I quickly greeted before she even had the chance to finish her greeting to me.

"How can I help you?" The professor asked, her eyes trained on the computer as she typed something.

I almost choked, immediately regretting bothering her to begin with. She seemed busy, and like she'd get annoyed if I told her the truth. After a few seconds of trying to get my voice unstuck from my throat, I practically jumped when she replied once again.

"There's a line behind you and I have to leave soon to make it on time to pick up my son. Can we please make this quick?" She asked, glancing past me to see the line.

When I looked back, I saw practically half the class behind me. The pressure was too much, and I began to hyperventilate. I was going to be late to my next class and make all these other people late, and all I had to do was mention I accidentally missed my name in roll call.

I tried again once more, but an embarrassing garbled noise escaped my throat. Before I had the chance to compose myself, next thing I knew, I was outside my next classroom.

There was barely fifteen minutes in between the classes instead of those hour-long breaks we'd gotten accustomed to having for studying or hanging out. I barely had time to catch my breath, as my head was pounding with stress just as class had begun. I felt suffocated and ridden with shame, my chest so tight I felt my throat dry and stiff.

Why was this happening to me? I was usually nervous on the first day, but I'd never actually felt like I was going to die until now. I couldn't breathe and my head hurt so badly. My body was turning against me, trying to break me down and reduce me to nothing, just as the drunk driver who hit my freaking sister happened to do.

There was no one to run to, no one who could help me anymore. The panic was coming in so much harder than I could take. The halls were too big, too crowded. There was nothing to hold me. It was like an endless rollercoaster drop, my stomach in my chest and my feet ungrounded.

I was suddenly in a corner, my face behind my knees like I was a child again.

"Sarah? Jeez, what happened?! Are you good?"

I could barely see through the tears blurring my vision, but the shape in front of me was one I remembered with disdain.

I would've been scared out of my mind if I hadn't already been dealing with my worst fear at the moment.

"Uh- let's get back to your dorm... I'm not sure what's going on,  but Emily can-"

"She's dead," I muttered.

"Wait, Emily??" Shelby choked, her eyes widened.

I let my face fall back into my knees as I covered my head. This nightmare was becoming real for everyone, and I still didn't want to be a part of living in it. I'd cried myself out, but the overwhelming feeling was still hitting me all at once. I had nothing left to express it.

"I- uh... I'm sorry, Sarah."

Those were words I'd never expected her to string together for me ever.

"Who can I call?" She awkwardly squatted to kneel down to my level, lightly holding her stomach with one hand, and the other pressing against the ground to support her.

"Are you pregnant or did you get fat?" I asked, no longer scared of hurting people's feelings.

"Pregnancy weight. Thanks Brandon. Anyway, isn't that tall girl with purple hair your friend or something? I can call her with your phone," Shelby offered quickly.

Brandon, Emily's ex-boyfriend that she cheated on Calvin with, got Shelby pregnant?

"Brandon got you pregnant? Was this before or after... the cheating?" I asked, the distraction actually helping slightly.

"Before," she groaned, "Anyway-"

I saw her pause for a moment, then she sat beside me.

"Yeah, that guy got me pregnant, and I didn't realize it until after we broke up after the cheating garbage. Before you ask, he knows. I'm not ready to be a mother, and he's not ready to be a father," she began talking, and I just listened.

"His name is Atlas. I won't be the one raising him though. Brandon will have the choice to be a father if he wants, but if not, I'll let a nicer family adopt and raise him," she tapped her stomach with a sigh.

I looked at her, noticing how she actually seemed content with her decision.

"Sorry she cheated with Brandon," I shyly added, knowing Emily never apologized.

"I ended up finding a better guy, I'm not that upset with her anyway. Kinda learned some friendships don't work out well when you give their twin a rough time," she laughed awkwardly.

"Who would've known?" I joked, feeling a bit lighter. At least I'd gained somewhat of an ally out of a former enemy.