Kayce Dutton Imagines

Imagine Pregnant after a loss

Y/N POV: I paced the bathroom waiting, when the lines popped up I felt horrible, as much as it pained me to say it, I felt scared, and most of all regret.
What if I lose this one, fail him again, what if we can't have any more babies and what if the only child I could give him was a dead one. When I heard a knock on the bedroom door I quickly hid the test in the towel cupboard and left the bath, to be greeted by John. "Hey, Kayce and the gang should be back up from fishing in a few, he called and asked me to check up on you. Apparently you weren't answering your phone." "Oh yeah sorry" I stuttered. John looked at me and said "you okay hun, you don't look so good" at that moment I started crying, and dropped to the floor. He came right over and asked what was going on.
John POV
All she would say is "he's gonna hate me, what if I fail him again" over and over. I put two and two together, that along with the fact she's acting exactly like Evelyn did. I told her "Kayce will be okay, this baby will survive." "How did you" she started. "When you have been around a pregnant wife 5 times you learn a thing or two" "wait 5 times? Jamie's adopted and that leaves Kayce, Lee and Beth" "yeah Evelyn and I had a boy just after Lee, he had the cord wrapped around his Neck, they thought he died 2-3 days before he was born. Evelyn knew something was wrong but the doctor didn't think anything of it, that doctor he went on a train trip I think in the early 80's and never returned back to this town, oddly enough" he chuckled, and continued "Our boy was buried right beside Elsa Dutton, he has an unmarked plot. Evelyn didn't talk about him and said the kids didn't need to know about him, she loved William just the same, we held him and I have a photo I keep in the safe they took of us with him that day, but when we got home, she just kept all that grief and emotion about him to herself, even from me at times." "Oh god I had no idea sorry" "long time ago" "wait what about the other baby that's 4? Shit sorry" "It's fine. That was something you can never tell Beth, just so we are clear, she will blame herself. She still blames so much of that day on herself decades on" I nodded. "Evelyn was pregnant the day she died, it wasn't planned but we had thought she wasn't able to any longer and continued on as such, anyways she found out 4 weeks before her death. When she told me I wasn't over the moon but, I loved the 4 living we had and William. I guess I thought what the hell? She was 14 weeks the day of the accident, it was a little girl. She never even had a name, I couldn't pick one without her, I put them both in the ground and buried it inside me as well. I don't think I ever have spoke of her since" "holy shit, that's how you knew what to do and all the information, how come they don't know?" "Lee knew about William and of her. But only because he was 5 with William and remembered a baby in moms tummy that never came home, then he had to help me make the arrangements with Evelyn and someone gave him the death record which had that information on it, he took it to his grave" "did he ever ask about it?" "Yeah he brought it up once, he asked if I knew" just then Kayce piped up from the doorway and said "he took what to his grave" "Son somethings you don't need to know" "I think I do" "Y/N you can tell him just stays in this room, I gotta go" with that I left.
Y/N POV
"Your dad was just explaining to me how pregnancy can be after a loss" "how would he know" "your mom" "what" "she had a baby boy named William after Lee and before Beth, the cord was wrapped around his neck" "holy shit, why did he never say anything when Monica was expecting or you? Why did you two talk about that today?"
"Because..." I started to cry "I am so scared we will lose this one" I responded to her "wait what, oh babe, we can't control that, but we will do our best, I will fly in whatever doctors we need to, babe it's gonna be okay" "I know I just we lost him and the kids, how do we tell the kids again if something goes wrong, I can't break their hearts again" "it will be okay they know that it wasn't our doing and that our boy is being looked after by Monica and Mom." He continued "now please get up off this uncomfortable floor and come for a ride with me" "okay just give me a few, I think we should go see him" "ya, we can I will head down to the barn meet me there, I love you, and this little one" I said touching her stomach. "Love you too" Y/N said.