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Chapter Sixty Three.

"Yes please," I nod and hang the towel back at its original place before making my way to him. The tension on his face has my heart aching. I snake my hands around his waist and hug him tightly. "We don't have to talk about her baby." my eyes find his, my hands rest on his cheeks and bring him closer to me kissing and tasting on his soft meticulous lips. He grabs onto my waist. It's not long before I pull away and give him a small smile.

"More," he whispers.

More? More what? More kisses? More me?

He lifts my dress up little by little and the moment its over my butt, I stop him.

Shit.

His sigh hits deep this time around and I know I've even disappointed myself in this situation. I mean I'm ready but...

"I... I'll go check up on Nzwano," he says and leaves me right there wondering why I had to do that. With my own sigh I head off to the closet to change out of the dress and into one of his 'old' loose tops and my own pajama shorts.

Stepping out of the closet I find him seated on the bed texting on his phone.

"I'm sorry. I-..."
He looks up causing me to halt at my speech and instinctively look at my feet and pedicured toes.
"I got scared." how my voice almost sounded like I'm trying to whisper when I wasn't in the plans of doing so has me weirded out.
"I scare you now Ma'Dlamini?"
"No," I look up just as quickly as I look down again, thinking about how quick I was to respond to that. "That's not what I meant."
"You aren't ready and I get that. We don't have to have to talk about this."

I look up again and find him in his dismissive state, back to minding his phone. I sigh and make my way to bed, a bit angry about how stupid this interaction was. I could also hit myself in the face for this too because deep down inside I was only afraid I wouldn't feel the same to him. Ridiculous I know since I knew how the female body worked especially after pushing out a human.

"Malinga please move," I say trying to pull the blankets that he's sitting on over my body. He stands and I succeed in making myself disappear.

I can't sleep. I can't breathe properly under these heavy covers I've buried myself under, but I'm not about to move. Am I being childish?

Of course not. He's the one being ridiculous.

But now I want to know what the Queen was calling him for. I thought we were done with each other the day his lovely son defecated on the palace floors and having Zonke... Ya we know what happened. What more does she need and want from us... Or rather from Bangi?

She's going to put him back at that place I couldn't bare, all because of the unknown. I could go a lifetime without seeing my husband like that again. Why does that sound so selfish?

Sigh.

So now we're not cuddling miss selfish?

Don't turn Zano. If this is how he wants to be then so be it. I can be cold too. Very cold. Don't turn Zanokuhle. Don't do it. Don't you dare!

Mxm.

I throw a leg over his lower body after laying my hand on his warm dressed chest.

"Oh so now you're going to play the aloof game with your one and only wife?"

I see a glimpse of a smile play on his lips before he goes back to being serious again.

"Ukwatile vele Malinga?" I ask and reach to caress his beard, gently tangling it with the nail of my pointy finger.
"Awazi wena"
"Silwela ikhekhe lika bani kanti la? " I chuckle after he gasps and looks at me, not closing his mouth. We have amusement now, dancing all over his face before he slightly shakes his head.
"Ma'Dlamini is that how you want to play this?"
"But I'm asking." I giggle.
"Nami ngiyabuza." he smiles and I can't help but stare into those beautiful eyes of his.