One Step Ahead Part II | Sirius Black

Chapter 219

"It's okay," Gwen's voice is warm, and his shoulders break like the waves on the shore, his chest heaving like thunder and hands shaking like the flickering lightning. Merlin, he cries. He cries and wishes that the world was different. And she waits patiently, the two stoic members of the Order of the Phoenix finding refuge in shared exhaustion.

And what Sirius wants is to stay here forever, to stay in the soft comfort of her bed, surrounded by windows with sheer curtains so the sun can still stream through and light up Gwen's hair and eyes. But today there is no light, and they can't stay here forever.

"What if we just tell Lily and James?" It feels wrong even saying it, but the thought Is there. Dark, greedy. Alice and Frank had tried to keep information to themselves too. What would be so bad about Gwen and Dumbledore not telling both families that one of there future children would die. That they would die.

Gwen doesn't say anything. She doesn't have to. And Sirius wishes he could smile at her Ravenclaw acceptance, her ability to learn the things that were so painful for others to even acknowledge. That there was no fairness in war, but there are morals.

"What happens next then?" He wonders softly. He wonders silently why it feels like the end has already happened, that the world is grey and sad and the damage that has been done is completely irreparable. Fear. An uncomfortable, painful emotion. Almost as much as grief.

"Next?" He leans his head back slightly to peer down at Gwen, running the pad of his thumb over her lower lip. It curves slightly, a hint of a smile that warms the coldness in his chest. "Do you want the real answer?"

His brow furrows slightly, waiting for her smile to grow. She liked that she confused him. He liked it too. But this time she looks only earnest. Her eyelids lower in a slow, heavy blink.

"I could tell you what I hope, what I want to be righteous and truthful." Her eyes open, pinning him with a stare that seems more pointed, like she wants him to remember, "Or I can tell you what is real."

Sirius swallows, razor blades tearing at his throat and nearly causing him to scream at the injustice, at the universe and the puppet master that is tying marionette strings around their necks that get tighter with each passing day.

"Real."

Gwen's smile fades slightly, eyes melancholy, "I should've known you'd pick that one. Too brave for your own good."

Sirius blinks at her, listening to the rain and the sea swell like a beautiful orchestra to accompany her voice, despite the sharpness of her words, "Next, Lily and James will have to leave. They must find a place to live, something obscure enough to be unnoticeable but not so insignificant to raise suspicion. They have to leave, and they have to hide. Until You-Know-Who is gone."

Sirius grimaces, shaking his head, "But that witch said—"

"That the one with the power to vanquish the dark lord will be born as the seventh month dies. Yes, I'm aware. Tell me Sirius—how many ways are there to cook an egg?"

His nose wrinkles, hand slipping up to rub his brow as a sigh escapes him. Riddles, Prophecies. Merlin, he wasn't cut out for this.

"I don't know, Ninnie," Sirius mumbles wearily, "Eleven?"

The Veela seems to ponder his answer for a moment before lowering her chin once, "Yes, I suppose there are eleven ways to cook an egg. Would you disagree with me if I said there are a thousand?"

He settles down into the pillows fluffed up around them, chest rising and falling slowly despite his anxiety over her odd questions.

"I find it hard to believe that there's a thousand—"