No Good For You

XLI

Sex with Jack was like...when you're so happy you cry tears of joy. You're not in any pain or overstimulation, you just feel so good that it brings you to tears. He was so sensual in the way he touched me and kissed or sucked over my body. There was no rush and I constantly had chills. He thrusted deep and slow and made our kiss more passionate and hungry.

I moaned a bit louder as he sped up.
"I know, beautiful." He kissed down my jawline and neck. I could feel my nails scratching up and down his back and I hoped I wasn't hurting him but I couldn't stop myself.
Our lips came together again as I finished. I could feel him smile against my lips then that he was beginning to thrust harder.
I whined softly before I came again and he pulled out and did for the first time.

He laid next to me.
"Well...I didn't expect that to happen." he stated.
I snickered.
"You are...wow..." he complimented.
I giggled and laid on his chest. "You are...long."
He laughed.

"I'd say we need to focus and work on the painting but..." He pulled me all the way on top of him. "I kind of want to go again." he smiled. I giggled at him before going down and starting a sweet kiss.

____________________________________

"I'm home!" I shouted from the front door so B knows I've made it back safely. Or else he'll have a panic attack.
"Alright!" he replied from his office.
I got in the elevator to go to my room.

When I made it, I started getting undressed so I could shower.
There was a knock on my door which made me sigh and put my robe on.

I opened it and Riot stood in front of me with his hands in his pockets.
"Hey?" I greeted as he rudely walked in without permission.

I closed my door and he sat on my bed and looked at me.

"Where have you been?" he asked.
"With Jack."
"Why?"
"Because I like spending time with my boyfriend?"
He gave a short sigh and looked away from me.

"Is this some everyday shit or..."
"Riot, what do you want?"
"You to be at home."
"Why?"
"I don't know! Stop goin' out so fuckin' much!" he commanded.
"The only times I'm allowed to even see the sun is when it's with Jack or you three! I don't wanna stay inside everyday! I have a life!"
He rested his face in his hand.
"You expect me to not go out with my boyfriend?"
"Stop sayin' that."
"Sayin' what?"
He didn't answer.
"Saying what?!" I repeated.
"STOP CALLIN' THAT BITCH YOUR FUCKIN' BOYFRIEND!"

I just stared at him.

"THAT'S WHAT HE IS!!!" I yelled back.
"Oh my fuckin-..." he sighed.

"You want me to just call him 'Jack'? This is my first real boyfriend. I'm gonna milk that title dry." I stated.

He just stared at the floor.

"What's your problem?" I asked him.
"What're you talkin' about?"
"You come in here tellin' me I'm not allowed to hang out with my boyfriend and you insult him."
He glared at me like he was actually pissed I kept using that title.
"What's your deal?" I wondered.
"Nothin'."
"Somethin'. Did something happen between you and Megan?"
"I haven't even spoken to her."
"You guys broke up?"
"No."

Weirdos.

"Just stop talkin' about her." he commanded.

I rolled my eyes and walked over. I sat on my bed beside him and he looked at me.

"How long is this gonna last?" he asked me.
"I don't know. Hopefully a long time."
"I don't want it to."

I stared in confusion and a bit of disbelief.

"And your wants come before mine?" I asked.
"That's not what I meant."
"Please tell me what you DID mean then. I'll wait."
He just looked back at the floor as he leaned forward with his elbows on his knees.

"Answer me, Riot."

"I don't know." he stated.

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" I stood up and turned to look at him.
He looked up at me.
"YOU CAN'T KEEP SAYIN' THIS SHIT THEN JUST CUT IT OFF AND SAY YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU DO KNOW!"
"I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE WITH HIM!" he shouted at me. "I DON'T WANT YOU GOIN' WITH HIM! I DON'T WANT HIM COMIN' HERE!"

"Is my happiness the problem? It seems like seeing me enjoy ANYTHING just pisses you off. When I'm single you make fun of me and say no one wants me and then when I'm in a relationship, you want me to get out of it. What did I do that was so unbelievably terrible to you that you hate to see me at peace with myself?"
"That ain't it."
"Then what is it?"
"...I don't know."

I walked to the door and opened it. "Get out, Riot."
He still sat there as he wiped over his face.
"GET OUT, RIOT!" I reiterated.
"No!" he responded.
I looked at him.
"I'm trying! Alright? I'm fuckin' trying and I just-...I need you to listen to me! I ain't good with my fuckin' words! Can you just let me think?!"
I looked at the floor and took a deep breath.

"Fuck it. Forget about it. It doesn't matter." He got up and walked out of the room.

"Riot!" I called to him.
He disappeared down the stairs.

Now I felt bad. I knew he struggled with being vocal. Even if I apologized, he wouldn't want to speak to me for a while so I just closed the door to my room and continued getting ready for my shower.