Chapter 19

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The Blind Concubine suddenly stilled. He had been snuggling in Chime's arms and exploring the other's body with his perceptive fingertips. The Blind Concubine had been caressing all over feather light, he did not want to wake Chime up.

However, his fingers now found something which made the Blind Concubine go completely pale. There was a scar under them. One that the Blind Concubine knew even though he had never before touched Chime's body when he was naked.

It could be a coincidence, he tried to convince himself. Surely, Chime could have a scar, even one just like this, there would be nothing too surprising. Nevertheless, the Blind Concubine could not shake the feeling that it was too much of a coincidence.

For he had once touched a similar – or the same? – scar in the past. It had quite a peculiar half circular shape. It was just under Chime's bellybutton. And there was a little mole in the middle of it, probably only perceptible when touched and unseen otherwise.

It was just like the scar that the Emperor had. The Blind Concubine could not be mistaken even after almost a decade from the last time he had touched that scar. He had found it very peculiar at that time and that was why it had gotten stuck in his memory.

And now, here was a similar, or perhaps the same scar as that one.

The Blind Concubine suddenly found it extremely hard to breathe. His body stilled as he was thinking hard about the situation.

Yes, everything could have been just a coincidence. But... The Blind Concubine's mind was flooded by all those little moments that he had been thinking that something has been amiss in his current life.

Like those times Chime brought him to his village and they passed through a field of flowers which smelled exactly the same as the imperial palace's gardens.

Like a strange feeling he got in that little village with the people not being the same for all his visits. Most of the time, the villagers did not remember him either. The Blind Concubine had though that his visits were simply not note-worthy enough. But what if there was something more to this?

Like the times when Chime brought him off of the island and the Blind Concubine could hear a commotion in the distance, or quiet and careful steps passing not too far from them. The Blind Concubine's house should be far away from any inhabited areas, even the walk to Chime's village took a whole hour. There should not be people around.

Like the times the Blind Concubine only mentioned something and Chime would immediately do it. Or he would procure all sorts of items that a simple village boy should have no access to. How Chime would give the Blind concubine money for their trips and never asked to be repaid.

Like that scar which was exactly like the Emperor's. And the aching all around and inside the Blind Concubine's body which was the same as last time as well.

The Blind Concubine used all his strength and pushed himself away from the person who was holding him. He suddenly thought that he did not know this person at all. Or perhaps he simply knew them only too well.

The Blind Concubine's heart shattered like glass.

***

The Emperor felt a little weird when he just laid there like a stone and let himself be touched by the Blind Concubine. He was completely frozen on the spot. He had finally noticed all the bruises he had left on that slender white body and the hair which was in disarray.

The Emperor had not held back after all. He had hurt his Blind Concubine yet again and he was already regretting it. Now, he did not dare to move at all in fear that he would cause the other even more distress and pain. The Blind Concubine might look fine at the moment, but there was no way he would not react in one way or another in the near future. He was probably still confused by sleep.

The Emperor had not wanted to be so rough with the Blind Concubine. Since their last time together, he had studied and he had thought he would be able to be gentler if ever he would have another opportunity to lay with the Blind Concubine.

The Emperor was blaming his loss of self-control on the aphrodisiac. It had made his head spin and his body way too aroused. And with the Blind Concubine begging him so sweetly and reacting so strongly to his touch, there had been no way for The Emperor to not go wild.

There was also another reason that the Emperor did not want to admit even to himself. It was way easier blaming the drug. He had been longing for the Blind Concubine for such a long time that all his reason had snapped the second an opportunity presented itself.

What should the Emperor do now? Should he try to somehow sooth the Blind Concubine? That would be extremely hard without speaking aloud and touching him. The Emperor still did not trust himself and he did not want to touch the Blind Concubine right now.

Or should he just speak and reveal everything? It would finally clear his conscience and let the Blind Concubine know who was laying with him.

No, he could definitely not do this. No matter how guilty or sad the Emperor was feeling at the moment, he knew it would ruin everything he had built with the Blind Concubine if the other came to discover his true identity. He had to remain 'Chime' and deal with the situation as this person.

He should most probably leave and go get the imperial physician. The Blind Concubine was hurt and needed medicine on the bruises and teeth marks. And a full body check-up just in case.

Before the Emperor could do anything through, the Blind Concubine suddenly became completely stiff and stopped breathing. The hands which had been touching the Emperor's chest and stomach were now starting to tremble violently.

Something was wrong. The Emperor got immediately alarmed.

Then, the Blind Concubine gave out a long, loud whine filled with unimaginable pain. The Blind Concubine sat up abruptly and pushed the Emperor away from himself.

The Emperor could not understand what had happened. The only thing which was clear was that the Blind Concubine was hurting. The Emperor got worried at once. He reached for his Blind Concubine, wanting to help somehow.

However, The Blind Concubine slapped his hand away and curled into himself. The Emperor was shocked.

His hand was hurting and his heart was even more so. The rejection stung in the worst way. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to be able to speak and ask the Blind Concubine what had happened.

Though, he was still hesitant. The Blind Concubine was in distress already. Learning that the man whom he believed to be his friend was in fact the Emperor himself would hurt him even more. The Emperor could not do that to him.

Instead, he resolved to his only means of communication with the Blind Concubine. He picked up his chime from a night table – even in his drugged haze, he had still managed to get both himself and the Blind Concubine to the bed and put his chime in his hand's reach in case of necessity - and rang it. He could only hope that the Blind Concubine would understand his unsaid question.

Are you alright? How can I help you?

The Blind Concubine turned towards him and the Emperor felt happy for a second. He had thought that he was being accepted again. All the burden and worry were lifted from him.

Only for a short span of a single second though. The fall from that high was only more painful.

The next moment, the Emperor noticed that the Blind Concubine was crying. He panicked yet again. He had no idea what was going on. And then, the thing the Emperor had been dreading the most for the last seven years came to be.

The Blind Concubine whispered brokenly and in utter despair: "Are you... Are you the Emperor?"

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