Nonhlanhla - Fortunate

Three

But as she lay down to sleep her mind kept going over their conversation. She unconsiously focused on trying to remember his face. She smiled because she knewing he was mixed, his skin light brown complexion and tightly coiled black hair gave him away, but he could pass as a light skinned black guy.

He had dark brown eyes and a wide smile. His voice sounded like he had practiced making himeslf sound more mature even though she was sure they were the same age. She stopped herself from fantasizing anymore than she already had, she had been hurt before by mistaking kindness and friendliness for attraction. She was grown now and vowed not to do that again.

After that day, she considered him a study buddy, a person she could rely on being at the library to save her a seat. She started noticing even more things about him like how popular he was, they couldn't go anywhere without someone recognizing him, and yet he had a calm and humble demeanour, only spoke when he had something to say and was friendly towards everyone which is a good thing and a sad thing.

It meant he had great manners but if he was only nice to her then it would have meant he liked her too, and since he wasn't, she presumed it meant he liked her just as much as he liked everyone else. Unfortunately for her, despite her best efforts Nonhlanhla was nursing a small crush on Warren.

She realised she had a crush on him the day she saw him wearing glasses for the first time. Her heart skipped a beat when he looked up at her. He had blushed furiously when she awwe'd telling him how cute and adorable he looked with his glasses on. Apparently his eyes gave him problems every couple of months so he only wore them when he eyes hurt. Even though she called him cute in a teasing manner, deep down she meant it.

To make matters worse Hlelile met Warren! He had greeted them and stood in line with them so he could talk to her at the cafeteria. Her nosey roomie wouldn't let it go after that and called him Nonhlanhla's man for weeks. It embarrassed her to no end especially when she insisted on doing so in front of him.

Nonhlanhla terrified of history repeating itself possibly being rejected again, got angry at her roommate and refused to speak to her and avoided Warren like he had the plague.

For two weeks Nonhlanhla restricted herself to going to class, eating junk food and binge watching series until she felt better. Her roomie apologised the entire week before resorting to bribery and bought Nonhlanhla a pack cinnabon and milkshake and just like that all was forgiven. Definately not one of her proudest moments.

A week later she decided to put her big girl panties on and finally face Warren again. She tried to explain her situation to him but he quickly put her at ease, stating that he knew Hlelile was just kidding, and it wasn't that big a deal, which made her heart tinge slightly but at least she still had her study buddy.

After that they started to hang out more often, mostly at the library and when one of them needed to go to the store. Nonhlanhla had never had a guy friend before, her parents had raised her to know that boys were off limits, escpecially with the high teenage pregnancy rate at her school.

She avoided any boys that showed her any attention not to mention the grown men that would flirt with her on her way home from school, in their expensive cars. But Nonhlanhla knew her parents had friends everywhere, all it would take was one of them seeing her walking with a boy and she would come home to get the beating of a lifetime. In her mind no boy was worth getting a beating for.

Warren laughed when she shared with him one day, "My mom is a strict Xhosa woman trust me, I understand. Once she swore that she would rip my balls off when she caught me sneaking into the house after I snuck out to go to a party! It was the last party I went to until our matric farewell." And it was my turn to laugh at him and we shared more learning about each other and bonding over having strict parents.

She found that it was ... enjoyable to have someone to talk to outside of res and classes.

Before they knew it exam season had came around and they finally to exchanged numbers, so they could coordinate and save each other a seat when the library got full, and they had to look for other study venues, if need be. That's when she started to consider him a friend.

One of the best parts of university was having no classes during exams, but that relief was short lived when faced with how much work students are expected to study in order to pass their exams, and the exam time table was brutal.

Nhlanhla basically lived at the library for that month, studying on NSFAS meant she had to be stringent with her spending and focused on getting her degree. Her parents were counting on her to do great things and they never failed to call each week to see how she was doing. She missed them, while enjoying the freedom varsity brought she still missed them but they gave her the energy she needed to persevere in her studies.

Before long the 1st semester was almost over and the cold June weather was upon them, exam season had been stressful and Nonhlanhla had been skeptical about giving her phone number to a boy she just met at varsity but he hadn't caused her any trouble. Just as promised he had only greeted her and coordinated times to meet up and if he studied earlier, he would communicate where he was seated and visa versa.

However, once exams finished most of the student population left for the holidays including Hlelile and Warren, Nonhlanhla couldn't go home for the holidays because she couldn't afford a bus ticket to go home, so she stayed in her dorm room in an almost deserted campus for the holidays. She endured the her coldest winter yet, just grateful to have electricity, food, a warm blanket and free wifi to stream series to her hearts content.

Her parents were really disappointed she couldn't come home but both knew their own financial position, the ugly truth was that neither could afford to pay for the trip to bring her home and take her back. But she didn't mind, she understood that if this was her sacrifice for a better future, it would be worth it.

During the holidays Warren had started texting her, she was sure he just felt bad for her, but without fail, he texted her good mornings and good nights to which she replied the same. Then it became discussing how each others day unfolded and then the last week before the holidays were over he called.

She was surprised but answered regardless. He said he missed the sound of her voice and she blushed and thankfully he couldn't see her. They talked for over three hours that day, neither wanting to switch off the phone. That was when she knew that her small crush was bordering on infatuation.

She knew he wasn't interested in her that way, she told herself that everytime he sent her a cute message or a funny meme or even when he sent a her a good night text. But her stupid heart wouldn't listen, it skipped a beat everytime she got a text because she knew it was from him, the butterflies in her stomach fluttered whenever she heard his voice and she smiled till her cheeks hurt whenever he paid her the slightest compliment.

But she couldn't help it, she knew she was going to get hurt, she was going to get her heart broken again she just knew it, she cried herself to sleep... trying to will her heart to stop.