All I Wanted Was You

Four

Josh's POV 

Choir was the best thing ever invented, ever. Except maybe guitar classes. So, sure, it was a little awkward that my mom was my choir teacher-she had actually been hired by my school, and apparently the previous teacher had been more than relieved to finally be able to leave, which was odd but I preferred ignoring that fact-but choir was still the best thing in my life. People were actually NICE there, not like... anywhere else. Maybe because we were all just a bunch of losers. 

I supposed my mom liked it too, but I knew she'd preferred her old job as vocal coach for actual singers and not little brats who, for some, could barely sing but thought they were Whitney Houston. In the end, both her and me had sacrificed our old lives for my dad's stupid studio. *insert grunt here* But she still seemed pretty happy to have found a job in the first place-especially somewhere where she could keep an eye on me at all times, which was essential for her after the "toxic chemical" incident.  

I hadn't talked to Hayley since that day. Sometimes I glanced at her during chemistry but I never caught her glancing back. Maybe she'd completely stopped caring. I wouldn't be surprised, after the way I'd treated her last time she'd tried.  

It left an irritating hole in my chest that I just wasn't capable of ignoring no matter how hard I tried. For some reason, the more time passed, the more I kept thinking about her. Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around? You know, "time heals all wounds" and all that crap? Well, that obviously wasn't working in my case. Hayley was becoming an obsession. Which, come to think of it, was a pretty creepy situation.  

At some point, there came that moment when I couldn't take it anymore. I felt like I would pop like a balloon and then dissolve into nothingness if I didn't talk to her RIGHT THEN AND THERE. Also, I figured I had to do something before I started taking pictures of her in secret and taping them all over my walls.  

Anyway, I was in choir-yay!-thinking about my apology speech to Hayley and watching my mom trying to teach some girl how to hit a note without sounding like a toad, when all of a sudden, in comes the one and only Hayley Williams.  

Great, now I was having hallucinations.  

Oh wait, she was real. "H-Hey..." she mumbled, waving unsurely, not looking at me. 

"Hey there!" My mom greeted her.  

My mom was a generally friendly person who had a way of making insecure people gain confidence just by looking at her. Just as I expected, Hayley's expression of sheer terror vanished from her face and when she spoke, her voice was louder and firmer. "I'm Hayley Williams. Uh, I was wondering if I could join your class?" 

My mom nodded, pondering the proposition. "Well, Hayley, it's a bit late for that, but I definitely still have a spot for you and if you think you can catch up..." 

Hayley nodded confidently. "Oh, I definitely can, Mrs..." 

"Ramsay." For a second, Hayley frowned in confusion. And then her eyes widened. 

Hayley's POV 

Ramsay? As in... Josh Ramsay? No, it was surely just a coincidence. After all, it was a common name. Still though, the fact that it reminded me so much of Josh made me uncomfortable. I had not stopped thinking about him since that day when our already bad relationship had been completely demolished. I didn't know if it was my fault or not-oh, who was I kidding? Of course it was my fault!  

But why had he acted like that? Ok, so it was definitely embarrassing to be half naked in front of the whole chemistry class, but all that crying for that? And why did he hate me so much? He's seemed like such a nice guy before-well, a complete asshole, but a nice asshole-and then all of a sudden he was acting like I'd killed his dog! I just wanted so bad to understand... 

I felt terrible and guilty, and it just wouldn't go away! No matter how hard I tried to think about something else it just kept coming back. I hadn't told anyone about it-not even my new friend Emily who was like the nicest person alive-and wasn't planning to. But I was starting to be worried about my mental health. 

"Hayley, are you alright?" Mrs. ... Ramsay asked, looking worried. 

I gulped. "I'm fine, yeah. Uh... thank you! For, you know, letting me... be a part of... all this." Ugh, what? 

She smiled despite my horrible thanking. "No problem." And suddenly, I didn't feel uncomfortable anymore. Maybe it was the soothing sound of her voice, or maybe her warm smile, but something about this woman made me feel just... good.  

And then I turned to face the choir and all my good vibes vanished. Because of course, HE was the first thing I saw. Standing right there, in the back with the other guys, staring at me. He looked away quickly, but not quickly enough. What was he doing here? What the f... 

Ugh. So maybe Mrs. Ramsay really WAS related to him and had forced him here or something. Just like my mom had forced-oh excuse me, my mom insisted that I say "urged"-me to come here. At first I had protested, but then I figured I had to do something with my voice eventually, since singing was probably the only thing I was good at. Finally, I had accepted choir as a pretty good idea. Until a few seconds ago that is. 

Mrs. Ramsay tested my voice, showed me my new spot among the sopranos and gave me a cheap book with lots and lots of lyrics. She explained to me what she'd already taught and kept an attentive eye on me for the rest of the hour. Judging by her proud expression, I supposed I wasn't bad for a beginner.  

Eventually, the class was over and everyone had to leave. Josh tried to bolt out of the room with everyone else but Mrs. Ramsay called after him. I lingered behind with the slower kids who were still chatting in order to stalk their conversation.  

"What is it, mom?" Josh asked through his teeth, sounding very annoyed. So she was his mother. Figures. 

"What's wrong with you?"  

"Nothing!" If I was his mother, I would not be convinced. 

"You look a little troubled. Is there something you're not telling me?" 

He sighed. "Can we not talk about this now, please? People might be listening!" Well, he wasn't wrong. 

Finally, Mrs. Ramsay gave up and let him go. I was disappointed. I was dying of curiosity-and slightly ashamed of that. What was it that worried his mom so much and that he didn't want to talk about in public?  

One way or another, I managed to convince myself that it was my job to figure it out and help him with whatever his problem was. Why did I always have to get myself in trouble?