behind closed doors

eight

But is now necessary? He knew she wanted to go home just to cry in private. But should he let her cry alone? Hadn't she been crying alone for far too long? What did she need? What does she want? This was one of the few things that irritated Aaron, not knowing what his loved ones needed. So he pulls over to the side and runs inside her building, he concluded that he didn't care if she was angry that he'd come back for her. His hand twists the doorknob, and her door opens "Emily?" he calls out her name, he hears sniffles coming from her bathroom.

Her bathroom door is slightly open, but he doesn't barge in "Aaron, please just go home. I don't want you to see me like this." she begs him through her tears. Aaron closes his eyes, feeling her pain "I won't come in unless you let me," he reassures her "But I'm here to stay. I'll be on the other side of the door, and I'll be here as long as you need me to." he says, leaning on the wall to rest his tired body.

"But Jack-"

"Jack will be fine. Jessica's with him," he tells her

"I just don't want you to see me struggle so hard," she confesses "You've only really seen the good parts of me. Sure you've seen my ugly too, whenever my mother was in town," she sniffles "But this, this is different Aaron, and no one has ever seen this part of me." Emily sounded scared, but she needed to warn him.

"It's not going to scare me away, Emily. I've seen a lot in my life, and I don't think anything you could ever do would push me away," he tells her but she scoffs "Like you didn't just push me away for months since I've been back?" she knew it was a low-blow, but she really needed him to prove her wrong, that he was, in fact, being truthful, and that he's not just going to get up and walk away the second things get hard again.

"I'm sorry," he apologizes "I don't think I could ever forgive myself for pushing you away like that. I wish I could take it all back, or make you forget for hurting you so badly." he stays put in his position, leaning onto her wall. He didn't leave.

"We both hurt each other during that time," Emily adds, feeling guilty.

"Tell me what you're feeling, please" He begs through his broken voice.

Emily sighs "It's just so complicated, Aaron. I don't know where to begin, and I don't want to burden you and your family, and the team," she says. Aaron shakes his head "You are not a burden. Listen to me, you're my family. You and Jack. You two are the most important people in my life, and I need you to know that." he tells her, feeling his heart break at the thought of her not knowing this. She listens to him, wanting so bad to believe every word he said- but some part of her would not let her believe that she was worth loving.

"I-" she begins, taking a deep breath before saying what she has really been wanting to say, "I think I need to take some time off work, and I think I need to see someone, professionally. I'll come back though, I'll be here in DC with you and Jack, and I'll be back before Strauss leaves. But I- I think I need a break." she shakes.

Aaron breathes a sigh of relief "Okay," he tells her "If that's what you need, I support you. Take all the time you need, I mean it." he says.

Emily gathers herself off the floor and wipes her tears away with the palm of her hand and reaches for the door, opening it to reveal Aaron leaning on the wall. She stares at him, and he stares back at her, him waiting for her to say something "Thank you," she tells him "Thank you for understanding". Aaron straightens himself, using all his strength not to reach out for her and hold her tight in his arms. But she beats him to it, and she furrows her head into his chest, wanting to feel his warmth.

"Can you take time off tomorrow?" she asks him,

"Yes," he replies, knowing it would mean cancelling 3 scheduled meetings, and stacks of paperwork to be put on hold. But it didn't matter. She was more important.