behind closed doors

eight

They stand there, cuddled into each other's arms and enjoying the warmth their bodies gave them "What about Jack?" she asks, her head on his chest "What about him?" Aaron counters "Does he know I'm alive?" she holds in her breath as Aaron rubs her back "He knows you're alive. He doesn't know you're here though," he replies. This makes Emily lift her head off his chest to look at him "What did you tell him happened to me?" she gulped "I told him you went away on a secret mission" he answeres as she snickers "A secret mission? Like I'm Batman?" she raises her brows "Hey! He loves Batman."

"When can I see him?" she asks, but it sounded like it was a request.

"Do you want to see him tonight?" Aaron rubs her shoulders as she nods and a smile forms on her face "Okay, let's go home then."

They'd gotten home at around 11:47 that night, and Jessica had already put Jack to bed. She said he was feeling a lot better, but not quite himself yet. Aaron thanked Jessica for her help as she makes her way into his living room, giving Emily and Aaron privacy.

Emily leans on the frame of the door, watching Jack sleeping soundly "He looks a lot like Hayley." she says out loud, realizing her mistake, she turns around to face Aaron "I'm sorry I-" she begins to apologize, to which Aaron furrows his brows in confusion and rubs a hand down her arm "It's alright. You don't need to apologize." he tells her "You're right. He is starting to look more like Hayley" he agrees with her. Emily swallows a lump in her throat before turning back to face Jack "He would've been such an amazing big brother." her hand travels down to her belly and she smiles sadly. Aaron keeps her close to him "I know," was all he could say.

She walks towards Jack, kneeling on the carpet so she could sit comfortably near him. Her fingers softly run through his hair "You're gonna be okay. I'm here" she whispers, feeling his hot temperature on her hand. Aaron kneels beside her "Who knows. You might be the only medicine he needs." he tells her as she smiles at him.

"You're welcome to stay here if you want. Or I can drive you home" Aaron says, hoping she would choose the first option. Emily sighs "I think I should probably go home," she tells him even though that's not what she really wanted "Okay." Aaron nods his head, respecting her decision.

The only reason she chose to get dropped off was that she needed to cry. She needed to cry, and scream, and hug herself to sleep. And she didn't want Aaron seeing her like that. Ever since surviving her near-death experience, she wasn't the same. Emily thought it was stupid that she was required to receive counselling, so she lied in every appointment, knowing that if she was being completely honest with her therapist then she would leave the office with a bunch of different diagnoses written on her back. But she knew she needed help, she knew she wasn't able to just keep all of her struggles to herself.

-

"Emily," Aaron says her name before she was able to shut the passenger seats' door "I know we have a long way to go- trying to earn each other's trust back but- you can talk to me. I haven't been showing anything to prove it true, but I'm here to stay. Whatever it is you're afraid of, it's not going to scare me away." He tells her, pure honesty coming straight from deep within. Emily smiles sadly "I know. And I already do trust you" she says before shutting the door closed. He watches her get inside the building, making sure she got in safely before driving away.

He noticed it right away, the second she showed up at the BAU from Paris, he knew she wasn't fully herself. How could she? She had gone through something extremely traumatic. He knew Ian impaled her, he knew that bastard tied her up to a chair for hours, he knew Ian beat her. But what else did he do to her? Did he even want to know? She was hypervigilant twenty-four-seven, always looking around her surroundings as if she were afraid something terrible was going to happen, flinching at every movement and sound, she became overly sensitive to things that would never have bothered her before, frequently apologizing for things she has no fault in, and over-compensating. In his professional opinion, Emily was suffering from PTSD and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. But he wasn't going to tell her that, he wasn't unless it became absolutely necessary.