I Couldn't Care Less

+ Sharks +

Ben loves me. That's all I have to say. I have a proper boyfriend now who actually loves me. Oh my God I can't believe it. I have an actual boyfriend who says he loves me. REGULARLY!!

+ + +

"Cody come and get your rubbish that you've left on the bench, here." my mum calls.

I scoff. "Hey, mum, I'm on a call with my friends right now." I inform her.

"Correction, your boyfriend." I glare at her. "Okay! I'm sorry! But baby, please come and tidy up your mess."

I run off to my room and pick something off the floor. It's a polaroid of Ben and I. It was one he gave to me on my birthday. He's written something at the bottom, below the picture.

It says; 'baby boys'. He calls us that all the time. I don't think he means it as a pet name, because, then again, he's never really called me that.

Is it too early to call each other pet names though?

I mean, we've kissed, and we've done the whole 'oh my God, did you just say you love me' thing, and we've had- oh. Well, we haven't quite gotten to the sex bit yet, but I was hoping we could wait a bit longer for that. I think.

+ + +

I finish cleaning my room and get back to my conversation with Ben.

He picks up the phone.

"Hey, now's... not the best time to talk. I gotta go. I'll see you at school tomorrow. Love you!" he says, and it feels like he's right next to me.

"Love you!"

I now have nothing to do. Luke runs into my room with his trucks.

"Hey poo head, wanna play trucks?" he asks, jumping up on my bed.

"Well, you just called me poo head, and I don't know why you would want to play with a poo head, now, would you?" I reason. "I mean, I wouldn't." he grumbles.

"Fine. I'm sorry I called you a poo head. Now can we play?" he smiles up at me.

"Hmm.. only if.." I say, waiting for him to finish my sentence.

He sighs. "I promise I won't walk into your room without knocking, and I won't think to knock when Ben is here."

I smile. "Can I have the red truck?"

+ + +

"So, uh, you can't come for a sleepover tonight, because my dad's coming for dinner, and I don't think you would want to be in the same room as him, because there'll be alcohol." I have out my diary and pen. Ben wants to stay the night this week.

"Certainly not." he shakes his head, looking slightly disappointed. I touch his shoulder.

"Hey, Ben, I promise I don't mind staying at your house for the night instead." he doesn't want me to stay at his, because he has Harrier that barks whenever cars drive past. "Couldn't Bella just sleep in her crate?" his parents absolutely adore me, so they'd probably make the dog sleep in the lounge, just while I'm there.

"But, what about at day time? Where will she go then?" he looks worried. He doesn't seem like he wants Bella near me, but not in a bad way, I'm sure he just wants to keep me safe.

I sigh. He has a good point. There's not really any place for Bella to go at daytime, and I'll still be there. "I don't know." I say.

He knows I want to stay over. He sighs. "I'll ask my mum." he says.

"Ask her what?"

"We'll see if they can get Bella a place to stay at the dog hotel while you're here." he gets out his phone, starting to text.

"Ben, no, that's expensive." he puts his phone down.

"That, or we could have her tied to the fence the whole day?" I look down. He snickers. "I'll see what I can do."

+ + +

When I get home, I decide to write a song. I've never written a song before, but I do play the guitar, and my mum says I'm very musical. The reason I've only chosen to do this now is definitely not because Ben told me he writes songs a lot.

I sing, and I have a fairly ordinary voice, but the only song I've ever written was about a cat peeing on a lawn, and let's just say my year three music teacher wasn't very keen on that for the schools talent show.

I get out my notebook, and start to write. The first line I write is useless. I'm not going to write a song about going to bed too early at night. It would be a fun thing to show my mum, though.

I groan. I'm not as creative as Ben. I'm sure he has about seventy books filled with lyrics to songs he's probably forgotten about by now. Then again, at least one of them is probably about me. I wonder if it's about me in a good way, or about me in a bad way.

Either way, I don't really care. As long as I can figure out the lyrics to a decent song.

+++

I write a song about Ben.

God, I am so gay.