More Than I Could Ever Say

02~ thinking, thinking, thinking

02
thinking, thinking, thinking
~

It's easy to think about somebody when you know nothing about them. No backstory, no insight, no name. I couldn't help but think about him as I laid in bed trying to fall asleep.

I'm currently living with my friends in an apartment off campus. We are seniors in college and had gotten this place last year. It's a beautiful apartment and the only reason I have it is because I got financial aid, otherwise I would never be able to afford a place this nice.

My family isn't struggling with money, but ever since my parents divorced my mom can struggle with finances at times. I help her out when I can, but I'm also paying for everything on my own, so I can't give her everything.

I moved around in my sheets trying to get comfortable again. I wonder why he wasn't talkative at all? He seemed like he had something rough going on, but he also doesn't seem like the type to open up. Like I said before, he was pretty. Extremely pretty.

When he smiled at me it got even better. His eyes seemed to be darker, but they were intimidating. I couldn't stop thinking about his voice. It was smooth, satisfying like I could listen to it to fall asleep at night.

Why am I thinking so much about this guy that I might not even see tomorrow?

My phone rang and I picked it up. There was a message from my roommate.

Ellis
Girl r u up?!?!

Ivy
Yes I'm up what do u need

I heard a knock on my door and then it opened. She did this a lot and I loved it, we were close. We had drifted during college, but after moving in together it was like we never stopped being friends.

"He won't stop texting me dick pics!" She plopped down on my bed and turned the lamp on. She flipped her phone to me, "See! It's not even a nice dick." She frowned at her phone, turned it back to her, and then turned it off.

"Gross! I didn't want to see that." I laughed as she laid down next to me. She giggled, turning towards me and getting under my covers.

Ellis was a pretty girl. With natural brown wavy hair and green eyes, guys and girls stopped everywhere to look at her. Ellis is bisexual so she likes the attention from everyone.

I experiment in bed, but not with relationships. Ellis has taken me to a few places to meet girls, but there is never that romantic spark and that's okay. I like my men.

"Why were you gone so long today?" She asked me while I stared at the ceiling. "You weren't back up there, were you?" I turned towards her and didn't say anything. My silence was enough of an answer.

"Ivy, are you okay? You've been going up there a lot lately. I'm worried about you." She took my hair and pushed it behind my ear. She started talking in almost a whisper, "I don't want you-"

"It's fine," I quickly spit out. "I'm fine. I met someone there today too so I had company. You don't need to worry." I could feel myself becoming frustrated. She was just worried about me after what had happened at that spot, but I was fine. I've come to peace with the events that have taken place there, it's all good.

She scrunched her eyebrows, "Who? Literally no one goes up there besides you."

I sighed, "I don't know."

Ellis laughed, she looked at me confused. "What do you mean you don't know? Did you get a name? Age? Body count?"

I turned towards her, "Nothing." She sat there without talking, wanting me to elaborate on what I meant. "He just came up there, he spoke like, two words and then left after I drew him."

"You drew him? Well let me see," she exclaimed. She sat up from her position, both of us sitting up now. I just laughed and looked at her. I didn't even have the drawing anymore so I couldn't show her. "What?"

"I don't have it."

"You don't have it?"

"No," I rolled my eyes, "I gave it to him before he left." She looked at me and smiled. Why is she smiling?

"That's cute," she looked away. Her smile was still on her face and she looked back up at me. It was a silly smile, like she had something to say. "That's really cute," she repeated.

I ignored her, she was just being weird. "I told him 'same time tomorrow' so I'll ask his name then."

"Okay... whatever you say." She stood up from my bed and started to walk towards the door. "Make sure to get some sleep for your mystery man," she giggled.

"No mystery man!" I yelled back at her as the door shut. I laid back down, turning off the light on my bedside table.

I was more comfortable now after talking about it a little bit. Of course he was still in my mind, but he wasn't flooding it like he was 30 minutes ago. I was relaxed.

Hopefully tomorrow he'll be at the top and I'll get to draw him again. Hopefully he'll be there to distract me from blaming myself again.

~
I know there's chapters are short, but I just need something to write at the moment. Sorry if this story really isn't that good or thought out right now lol