i hate scary movies.

1.17

Billy moves his head some more against me. "Sid," he says, looking at her, "you know what time it is." He turns back to me. "It's after midnight. It's Sid's mom's anniversary." He turns back to her. "Congratulations. We killed her exactly one year ago today. "

"Attention!" Stu says, coming back into the kitchen with someone. "Oh, what do we have behind door number three, ladies?"

Billy makes a fake surprised face when Sid's face drops. "Daddy!" she says, going for her dad, but she can hardly move, and Stu pushes her back into the counter.

"Hold it!" Billy says to her as Stu goes back to Sidney's struggling dad. He's on the floor, duck tape around his mouth and wrists and legs.

Stu grabs the voice box and puts it to his mouth. "Guess who won't be needing this anymore," he says, putting it in Sid's dad's jean jacket pocket. "And, oh, look at this. Ring, ring." He flashes their cellular phone, also putting it in the jacket pocket. "Won't need this."

Billy squeezes me, making my jump against him. "Got the ending figured out yet?" he asks.

"Come on, ladies," Stu says to us. We share a glance. "You're smart. Think about it now, huh? Sid's daddy's the chief suspect. We cloned his cellular." He pushes him on to the ground. "The evidence is all right there, Baby!"

"What if Sid's father snapped?" Billy asks in my ear. "Sid's mother's anniversary set him off, and he went on a murder spree, killing everyone."

"Except for Billy and I," Stu says, gesturing between the two of them. "We were left for dead."

Billy points the knife at Sid. "Then he...kills you." He points it at me. "Then...you. I cry over your dead body, my poor girlfriend. Then he shoots himself in the head. Perfect ending."

"I thought of that," Stu says proudly, chuckling.

"Watch this," Billy whispers in my ear, moving me to the side as he goes to Stu, who's face drops. "Ready?" he asks.

"Yeah, yeah!" Stu says, nodding and hopping around. He puts his hands behind his head. "I'm ready, baby! Right! Get up! Yeah, babe, get up! Hit it!"

I turn and see them right as Billy stabs Stu in the side of the stomach. Sid and I both gasp as Stu groans and whines. "Good one, man. Jesus," he almost cries. "Oh, shit."

Billy looks at my expression proudly. What the hell is wrong with him?

"My turn," Stu says, making Billy turn back to him.

Billy hands him the knife and points at him. "Don't forget. Stay to the side and don't go too deep." He grabs my jacket and pulls me forward, making me watch. I wince.

"Okay, I'll remember," Stu says.

Billy turns to me again. "Look at me," he whispers. "Look at me, Love." I look at him, and the smallest smirk appears on his face. "There you go."

Stu stabs him, and he shouts, letting go of my shoulder to double over. "Fuck! Fuck!" he shouts, moving a few feet away. "Fuck! God dammit, Stu!'

"Sorry, Billy," Stu says. "I guess I got a little too zealous, huh?"

"Give me the knife."

"No."

"Give me the knife!"

I glance at Sid, then at her dad.

"Now!"

Stu gives Billy the knife, and they both look at me. Billy gets his face closer to me, studying my face for a moment. "You see, girls, everybody dies but us. Everybody dies but us," Stu says, and Billy turns back to him. "We get to carry on and plan the sequel. 'Cause let's face it, babes, these days, ya gotta have a sequel!"