Life, death, & the in between

Chapter Three

The feeling of Kylo within my arms is so real, every muscle glides beneath slow fingertips as they trace down the center of his abs. Why does this feel so different...was everything just a dream? Rising a hand to my cheek nearly gasping at the feel of flesh and bone, of hot blood, and now warm wet tears as they flow down my cheeks.

Shooting up in bed both hands run all over my body touching at my skin, my clothes, at the body I have felt so detached from. Sighing heavily "I knew it! I knew it was all a dream! What a damn dream it was too."

Shifting to my knees excitedly shoving at Kylo "wake up! Kylo wake up!" Startling him awake, confused he scans the room attempting to catch his breath before spotting my figure when suddenly he freezes "(y/n)....what...what's going on? Where...how?...you've never visited me in my dreamed before..." confused by this statement arguing back "dreams? No Kylo that's what I'm trying to say, it was all a dream! I'm not dead, I'm here! Can't you feel me?"

Placing a hand on his arm the harsh flinch he makes as he pulls away staring at me with disbelief, suddenly the beautiful room begins to fade disappearing right in front of me.

Panicking I grab at Kylo trying to hold on crying out into the mess of the shit "NO WAIT! KYLO PLEASE!"

Once again we're on the floor of the fighter, Kylo's awake frantically searching his surroundings calling out into the dark "(y/n)?, (y/n) wait! Don't go! Please, I felt you! Come back!"

But it was too late the abyss was already sucking me back into its grips, the light was fading quickly and his figure was slowly fading with it.

Everyday past death is new, what just happened I think to myself surrounded now but nothing but black 'how could he feel me? Was it just a dream? We're we dreaming together this makes no fucking sense!'

The bigger question is 'can we do it again...'

....

Sighing into the darkness boredom has once again set in, who knew the afterlife would be so lonely. No one knows what happens when we die but I sure as hell didn't think it would be this damned abyss, stuck here for eternity to suffer in its grasp with only glimpses of the life I once was a part of.

Does everyone have a reason to be pulled back to the gates of life? Is it a rarity only I experience? Whatever it is I'm lucky to have even short moments of freedom from this prison, speaking of which seems to be coming on right about now 'I wonder what Kylo's doing this time, will I find him calm and alone or will I once again be thrown into a mess I was never prepared for.'

Starting with the slow sensation of fog around me it twirls revealing the slightest blue tint, sighing with relief 'ugh...thank you. I wasn't in the mood for another fit.' Turning around the glow grows stronger pulsating throughout the darkness slowly inviting me to its veil, finally approaching its core everything comes into view.

Surprisingly Kylo's asleep again, but nothing else seems to have changed? What day is it? Glancing towards the tiny clock on the fighters dash it flashes 3:15 am, realizing it's still the same night only hours after the event from earlier.

He must have just fallen back into a deep enough sleep to let me escape the void, sucking in a deep breath before chuckling to myself 'is that even necessary? It's not like I need air.'

Rolling my eyes slowly stepping from darkness into the ship's cold metal frame, shaking off that heavy slimy feeling of separating from the dark, eyes glancing around the room trying to figure out just how I go back to him. Was it a dream we had been reunited in? Was it a facade? I had to find out if there was a chance I could be with him, feel him...him feel me...I'd try again and again for the rest of time.