Natives of Wild Night

fight your demons

a conversation between my demon and I ensues in a swift back and forth exchange

-Hello again

-Hello

-How are you

-I don't know. How are you

-Good, but we both know we've seen better days

-I don't know about me, but you definitely have

-Fck you

I would like to note; this is the usual point in the conversation I distract myself, duck, run, hide, do whatever I have to do to make it end. I know this is the invisible line in the sand which I dare not cross, but I feel the pull too heavy this time and fall into the trap. I am curious, or maybe I want to finally see the death of something I hate with every piece of me.

-No no, now this is the time for you to listen. You've dragged me on for too long 

-And you have shrugged me off for too long

-How do I know if you're ever telling the truth

-How do I know that you are real

-You know only because I tell you so. Only because I feed you. After all, we are the wolf we choose to feed

-I don't care. I want out of the dream

-You can not get out. Not for years to come, unless...

-Unless what

-Oh nothing. We know you can't do that

-Forget it. Forget you

-You can't. I am with you. I am the itch you cannot scratch. I am the knife in your ribs. Have you noticed the sky tonight...the black curtain it is

-Listen

-No

-I am in control here. You have nothing without me. I tell you what you are...I decide if you have a voice, if you have a say in my life. And the time is coming for me to burn you. Watch you turn to nothing but ashes and dust. Sick to my stomach too many nights with you driving me crazy...making me believe lies and eating myself alive. I decide how and when this ends. I am the owner of you. You are my slave. I breathe air into your puny lungs and I make your heart beat. You will die when I say so. You will die how I see fit. 

-We will see. We've been here before. We've trampled over these same barren, ashy fields before and we know sadness. We know anger and fizzling inside the chest, the heart. You run for the escape, I pull you back kicking and screaming into comfort.

-No, it is not comfort. It is only a disguise. It is an illusion of safety and pureness, but nothing is pure. All is tainted and ruined in your strange lands while the world rolls on by to possible enlightenment. So the blade I hold I will kill you with this time, I cannot let you survive. Feeding into wretched madness, cycling through disgust, regret, hatred, weakness, tears. I will end you. I will end it all.