Forever Family (Klaus Mikaelson)

Should I stay or should I go?

Dear diary,

Nyctophile

"Nyctophile - a strong favoring or love of the night. A longing to be alone at night."

As I've mentioned before, I've always liked the night. I always like the absolute silence it provides. I like the tranquility that comes with being the only soul stirring.

But here in New Orleans, not a sliver of quiet is to be found. In a city like this, where the parties never cease and the chaos is eternal, one is never the only one about. There is never a time to be truly alone with your thoughts. I haven't concluded whether that is a negative or a positive, but one thing I have found is that when self-introspection is limited, you can't properly deal with your emotions. Hell, you barely even know where they stand.

But something as important and all-consuming as human emotion refuses to be quelled by a busy mind. They tend to run up on you and hit you all at once. Like a car crashing into a brick wall, the damage it will wreak will be grave. And many times there will be no survivors, not even the driver.

And tonight, tonight was one of those nights where I was driving full speed and the only obstacle that stood in my path was a 10-foot brick wall.

________________________________________

I Drive as fast as I can back to the house. As soon as I get there, I swing open the door to the compound and rush inside, so determined to complete my mission that I neglect to lock my car.

I fly in through the front door, a cloud of manic energy chasing my coat tail as I meet Nik standing at the entrance.

"That's it, Nik I am done!" I demand as I slam the door shut behind me.

"Clarissa," he replies, his head hanging low.

"I can't do this anymore-"

"Clarissa," he repeats.

"I just spent two hours trapped in a small room with my daggered brother, unable to do anything to save him. I'm done waiting. We're getting him back! Today, right now!"

As I start to run over to the stairs, Nik grabs my hand. " Clarissa, calm down."

"Calm down! Nik-"

"I know, I agree we spent enough time waiting. It's time to bring Elijah home. But we're not gonna get anywhere with you running around like a tornado." He tucks a stray strand of hair behind my ear.

I take a deep breath, nodding my head. I know he's right, but sitting in that room with them did something to me. Talking to Marcel did something to me. I'm not exactly sure what that something was but what I do know is that it set a raging fire inside my brain.

Maybe it was the fact that he hovered over my shoulder the entire time I spoke with Davina. Or maybe it was the fact that he spoke to me with false niceties, as if he desired a friendship with me like the one we had in 1920, as if Marcel was not holding my lifeless brother hostage in the very room we sat in, as if he hadn't betrayed me time and time again.

"What's on your mind, love?" Nik whispers, tightening his grip on my hand as he soothes the top of my head.

I shift uncomfortably on my feet. "Nothing." His consoling actions both comfort me and unsettle me. It doesn't seem right, him being so loving with me. Almost like it's too good to be true. Almost like it's all a dream that'll soon wake from only to realize my life is still the erratic, depressing mess it has always been.

"Ok then." Nicklaus plants a kiss on my forehead. "Let's go get Elijah."

I reach into my back pocket and take a step back from Nik. I unlock the screen and dial Roselle's number.