My Twin Flame | Scarlett Johansson

22: You Scared Me

Charlotte was being called down by my daughter. "I best get going."

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We were sat on the front of the house on the swinging bench. Rose was laid across us both fast asleep, her head in my lap. She's had a busy day not to mention the early start so after we ate dinner and came out here she completely crashed.

I was debating bringing up the children thing. How do you ask someone you're seeing but not their girlfriend yet about your future children without seeming completely crazy? How about a casual conversation, drop the idea in... But how?

"What are you thinking about?" She asked I looked away from the rolling hills and budding flowers and look at her, she was already looking at me, her brown eyes scanning my face for more information. "Nothing." "Don't lie to me." She smiled softly. "When you're thinking too hard you frown... So what is it??" "It's stupid." "Is it? Or are you just overthinking it?"

I inhaled a long breath. "You can tell me anything Scar." She rested her hand on top of mine that was sitting between us on the bench. "I was just thinking about raising our children here, in the future," I tell her looking ahead terrified of her reaction. She didn't say anything and I felt sick. I wanted to run from here and hide. "Say something," I asked her because the silence was deafening.

"Charles told me about your promise." I begin as she still hadn't said anything. "Not to have children." I flicked my eyes to her and she was chewing her lip looking out in front of her so I looked away again. "You're so good with Rose... How could you think you'd be anything like your mother?" I asked her, she moved her hand from mine and rest them both on top of Rose's legs as they were over her lap. "You'd be an amazing mum Lots, I want to experience that with you. Having our own little babies running around and-"I can't Scar. I can't chance it." "Chance what?" "Hurting a child the way I was by my mum." "You're not her," I begged her to hear me.

She couldn't even look at me. "I'm sorry." She says lifting Rose's legs up and standing leaving me alone. "Lottie," I called after her but she had walked off and wasn't coming back. Charles came out of the house. "I'll watch the little one, go talk." I bring Rose inside and lay her on the sofa in the family room before going to find Lottie.

She wasn't far just in the stables with the horses.

"Charlotte?" She looked over at me putting the brush down she was using to comb through Luna's tail. "I don't want children Scarlett. I'm sorry." "Why? Do you not want that with me? Our family. Here, helping your grandpa out and teaching our kids how to ride and they'd be happy. We'd all be happy." I tried. "What if I hurt them? Or leave them? Or both?" "Lottie you've been amazing with Rose since the day you met her. You had a dress shipped overseas just so she'd have a princess at her party. You knew me a day before you agreed to it." I reminded her. "You're attentive to her needs, you treat her like a princess, you respect her boundaries. You'd be a good mum." "She's not my kid. I didn't have a mum to learn off of. I don't know what a good mum is. And I don't want to take a chance and ruin a baby." "You wouldn't. I want you to see that. I'm not saying tomorrow. I'm saying in the future. Can't we at least just think about it."

I held both of her hands begging her. "You're not your mum. You're nothing like her." She broke eye contact with me. "Please? Just think about it." She pecked my lips before nodding slightly. A smile broke out on my face. "Thank you." I kissed her lips again. "No promises/" "I understand." She looked nervous. "You should go in get a warm shower." She tells me. "You've had cold showers since we got here." "Because Rose needs hot showers." "So go in before me." "I'll go in with you." She smirked. "I prefer that Idea."

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"How did your talk go?" Charles asked me the next day. Lottie and Rose were baking bread in the kitchen and I was helping in the store. "Um." I scratched the back of my neck. "What was it about anyway?" "Children." "Children?" "Her having kids in the future." I looked at him. "So are you dating my granddaughter?" "What?" "I mean you seemed rather invested in her future. I just assumed." I looked away and put the fresh jam on the shelf. "She won't be bothered if you tell me. I know everything." He pushed. "Yes, we are."