my future roommate

Chapter 16: Can we be more than friends?

Tine's POV (January 2017)

When I opened my eyes, it was 9.30am on the clock. But it wasn't my alarm clock that woke me up, it was the clackering from the kitchen. Sarawat was cooking something.

I walked out to the kitchen only to find Sarawat cooking at least three different dishes all at the same time. He looked frantic moving from one pan to the other. But that wasn't the problem — the problem was his eyes. He had crazy written all over him.

"Ahem.. hey Wat, good morning?" I spoke louder than usual to get his attention.

"Oh hey!" Sarawat looked up and smiled, but his smile didn't reach his crazy eyes.

"Good morning. Do you want to have some breakfast with me? I didn't know what you like, so I cooked a bunch of things."

I tilted my head in utter confusion. "Wat, you know we can't share things that belong to us.. we can only share things that are in this apartment" I said in a low voice, surprised he even forgot about it.

Sarawat's fake smile suddenly disappeared. "Fuck, I forgot we can't share food because I can't share my god damn world with you." He put the spatula that was in his hand down on the kitchen counter with a loud bang. "Great, so I guess I'll just throw out of this food out on the table."

"Wat, are you — are you okay?"

"I am fine. I am great. Fantastic." He took a whole pan of fried veggies and threw it into the dustbin.

He didn't even look at me in the eyes while answering. I couldn't even understand what was up with him, but something felt wrong. Very wrong. I looked around the living room while Sarawat was angrily dumping food, and that's when saw it again — the bloodied shirt Sarawat was wearing last night, lying down on the floor.

Pointing at the shirt, I said. "Instead of throwing out all that food, I think you should throw that away Wat. The stains aren't going to come out anyway."

"No, I am going to keep the shirt — and wait for it to disappear on its own."

"How would the shirt disappear..."

And that's when it hit me.

Sarawat was waiting for the shirt to disappear because he was hoping for the future to change again. Something happened last night.

Something happened that made Sarawat run back home, shaking. Something happened last night that is making Sarawat act absolute bat shit crazy right now.

"Wat.. what really happened last night?"

Sarawat looked up at me, staring for a few seconds before speaking up. "I don't want to talk about it."

"So something did happen last night... something bad?"

"You don't have to worry about it."

"I worry about you, Wat. I worry about you.. all the time."

Sarawat didn't say anything. He just leaned in on the kitchen counter with his eyes closed. "Don't ask me about things I can't answer Tine."

He looked like a lonely soul and I didn't know how to even help him. So I did the only thing I could. I closed the difference between us and circled my arms around Sarawat — hugging him tightly.

"I am sorry you have to go through everything alone. I am sorry you have to go through all of this at all. I know this is all my mom's fault. If it weren't for her, your dad might still be with you. You wouldn't even have to go through all these problems. I genuinely don't know how to shake off all the guilt. I am just so sorry --"