Blaze (boyxboy)

Chapter 28

            “Did you not hear what happened?”

            “Bits and pieces. You don’t have to tell me.”

            Good, I thought, because I’m not going to.

            After severally minutes of me ignoring the existence of Hayden, he finally took his leave when I started the music again.

            Being suspended wasn’t that bad. I mean, if I had to put it on a list it would probably come before graphing and after needles. Basically all I had to do was lay low all day long, that was of course after dropping Hayden off. I owed him that much for not telling Mom. The guilt was bad, but livable. And I hadn’t turned my phone on since I left the school. I considered just not turning it on because I didn’t want to deal with anyone.

            It was on the second day of my suspension though, that I had two visitors. I suppose one wasn’t really a visitor, but unexpected to say the least. I was lying in bed, reading a comic book when I heard the front door open. I was tempted to get up and check but there was always the possibility Mom had come home sick and then I was screwed, so I decided it was safest to stay up here.

            When I heard a deep voice, I realized my father must have finally made his monthly appearance back home. However, it was the giggle that followed his voice that perturbed me the most.

            Maybe it shouldn’t have come as a shock that Dad was cheating. Really, if he was barely home I shouldn’t have expected he be faithful. Part of me wondered if Mom knew, and that was why she got so upset that time he left near Christmas. Maybe she was just trying to keep the family together for us, that was definitely something she would do. The fact that Spock didn’t bark at the intrusion meant this probably happened regularly.

            They never came upstairs, thankfully, but that didn’t insulate me from what was happening on the main floor. I put my earbuds back in to block them out. In a way, I should have been more upset, but I just didn’t have a very close relationship with my family anymore. I blamed myself for that, a lot. I was never particularly close with Dad, because it’s pretty impossible to bond with someone you rarely see. And then there was Mom, and she was fine. She cared, and she did everything mothers should do, but I had managed over the past months to disappoint her. Which consequently led to me avoiding her because of the guilt I felt and it was torrentially downhill from there. The only one I really had was Hayden, which was pretty ironic.

            The final day of the suspension, Beatle turned up at my house. I guess I was sort of expecting that as well.

            He didn’t try to get my attention from my window, probably because my cell phone was a fairly good indication I didn’t want to talk to him, so he went for the front door. I knew he was here before he knocked on the door though. I could tell by the hum of his car. Maybe that made me crazy, or obsessed; I saw it as attentive.

            I put my bowl of cereal down and stared at the door in contemplation. If I didn’t answer, would he go away? Probably not. It was raining, so I decided I would let him stand on my porch a little longer.

            After about five minutes, I could no longer handle the incessant knocking. I threw my spoon into the sink and headed to the foyer, but I couldn’t stop myself from checking my appearance in the mirror. I could tell myself a million times that I didn’t care, and that he could go die in a hole, but that didn’t make it any truer.

            “Shit,” I muttered to myself at the milk stain down the front of my shirt. I considered changing it, but then I had to remind myself that he wasn’t worth the effort. He had fucked me over.