orphans | Mafia AU

Life As It Is | Chapter 1

Gon removed the scarf he used to cover his face. Sitting down on the bench, he took his shirt off and let out a sigh as his head leaned back against the glass. Gon and Killua had taken shelter in an abandoned subway car, months ago. They'd found it when venturing the subway systems.

Killua gave Gon a clean t-shirt. Gon took it, but made no move to dress himself just yet. He gestured to the bags that he set down on the bench across.

Killua looked through the bags. Gon had gone on a supply run. Killua wasn't allowed on the surface. It was too risky. It wasn't entirely safe to leave Killua alone down here, but Gon trusted that Killua could look after himself for the twenty minutes Gon would be gone, just once a week.

Killua took a seat on Gon's lap, cupping his face. Gon leaned against Killua's hands, exhausted.

"Are you alright?" Killua asked.

Gon closed his eyes. "Mm alright." He mumbled.

Killua tilted Gon's head up. "You should rest. Did you get the drugs?"

Gon was physically incapable of falling asleep on his own without drugs to assist him. He was injured badly just a few days after his birth, damaging the part of the brain that controls both sleep, and pleasure. He can't sleep, can't even feel tired. He feels exhaustion, but it can't put him to sleep. There were other side effects, of course. But those weren't important. Not now, anyways.

Gon had to take seven of these pills to fall asleep. The recommended dose was one pill every twenty-four hours. Taking more could have serious side effects. Those side effects, however, never affected Gon. In fact, some of them, Gon counted on. Such as prolonged sleep, drowsiness, and others.

As Gon's consciousness faded quickly, Killua smiled softly. He admired Gon in every way.

He helped Gon lay down on the bench, and took the one blanket they had and covered him. As he draped the blanket over Gon's body, Killua's hand brushed over Gon's shoulder.

Killua had always loved the way Gon's skin felt against his own. His hand went over Gon's shoulder again, he took note of how perfectly muscular Gon was. He'd always taken note of that, Killua supposed.

Killua's hand traveled up Gon's shoulder, to his neck, to just underneath Gon's jaw. When Gon did sleep, he slept like a rock. But not for long. He'd wake up within three hours fully energized, every time without fail.

Killua placed his lips on Gon's. He loved the way Gon's lips felt. He wondered how they'd feel, moving against his own. If only Killua had the courage to do this while Gon was awake. Maybe then, he'd know how it would feel for Gon's skin to move against Killua's own in response.

Killua was a coward.

"I love you," He whispered in Gon's ear, followed by a kiss on the cheek.

There was no response, of course.

"I love you." Killua repeated, leaning his forehead against Gon's.

It felt good to say it out loud.

He'd repeat it just a few more times, staying where he was. Each time, he'd imagine a different response Gon could give. Killua wondered if any of them would be Gon's true response. And if one were, which it would be. He wondered which was most likely.

He didn't know.

"Mm..." Gon hummed, rubbing his eyes as he woke up about an hour and a half later. He sat up, immediately scanning to see Killua. "Killua?"

Killua peeked his head through one of the doors. "Ah, you're awake."

"What're you up to?" Gon asked.

"Just finished putting away the food you'd gotten." Killua explained. He walked over to Gon's side. "Feeling better?"