Fear & Love

Thirty Four

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After a week of Anand not being at home, Gita had started to miss his presence truly. The first two days with Isha were good. Isha had a lot of updates on the development of her budding relationship. Isha even took her shopping and for movies. Then, it was her mother who called her up to stay with them. Gita felt great seeing her old room and spend time with her parents for the first time after her marriage. There are no big changes in her parents house yet a lot of things had changed. Her old room was just a box now with everything arranged like a hotel room. Her mom followed Gita to her room, "It doesn't look like your room, na?" Her Maa asked.

"Yah! It feels different but looks the same." Gita agreed with her mother.

"In the beginning, me and your Papa always came to this room when we missed you but now, it is loosing your touch." Her mother leaned on Gita's shoulder.

Two days of being in her parents home, she started to miss 'her' home. She constantly worried if everything was okay there even though the staff was used to handling the house on their own when Anand goes away, which he usually does.

Gita's father noticed the restlessness on his daughter's face. He told his wife that may be they should ask her to go back as she is staying here just as an obligation. Knowing their daughter and her nature, Gita was never going to say that she wants to go back. Gita was too polite to say she doesn't want to stay here anymore. So, he asked her mother to talk to Gita.

Gita was so relieved once her mother talked to her about this. Gita still asked multiple times if it was okay to go back. She knew it didn't make sense to tell them she wants to  go there when Anand was not even home, she just missed the place but she chose to stay quiet. Once her mother talked to her, she got to pack bags immediately. She didn't hide her desperation anymore and smiled widely, called her driver and within an hour to two was in her home.

She laid on the bed reading book. As expected, Anand only messaged the important things and made no attempt to call. Gita didn't see an issue in this but wanted to mock him and his fake talks. He was so not ready to leave her alone and almost begged her to come along but now that he is there, he doesn't even remember to call. "It seemed like he would die a day without me and now look, he doesn't even want to call." Thought Gita.

She remembers in college, her friend used to fight with her boyfriend and often say, "men and their fake promises." Gita almost chuckled at the memory now that she somewhere related to this sentence. Today, she missed him more than usual. Even his room has an intimidating vibe to it due to his overbearing personality. Before their marriage, this room was a witness to his strict composure and orders to his employees on the phone. That has changed after the marriage. The orders to his employees were not given here or at rare times does he talk about work here. The room saw his softness and adoration for a girl for whom he is trying to be nice.

Gita took a shirt from his closet, not believing what she is about to do. Was this what they call crazy? Is she finally losing it? She went to his expensive and elite perfume collection, took out his daily cologne and sprayed it lightly on his shirt. She made sure the door is locked so that noone witness this act of hers. Despite noone being in the room, she walked to the bed quietly and laid on it with the shirt in her arms. This was the closest she could feel his presence. She hugged his shirt and fell asleep clutching on it tightly.

The next morning, she blushed at her own act as if the world saw her. She wondered if she was the only one in the relationship who was desperate for his presence? Did he miss her as much? He would be so gloated if he comes to that she missed him so much to keep his shirt near her. For the entire next week, Gita kept his shirt near every night and the next day, she would practice in the mirror her reaction when he arrives. She was not going to show him how much his absence affected her. If he was okay to keep it limited to just messages and reply on call in one word, she was not going to jump on him when he arrives but to attain that self control, she needs practice and she does it every morning!