Please Don't Leave [n.h] // AU

2

I was in the car. I was in the backseat in the middle. I've been here before. I tried moving, but I couldn't. I was trapped. My mum was driving, and I saw myself sitting in the passenger seat. I remember how I felt in that moment.

Lost.

A good ten minutes before this moment we got a call that would change our lives forever. If only I knew how bad it actually was back then. My mother was talking but my younger self wasn't listening. I was busy thinking of how the people we were passing had no clue of what hell the people in this car were in. I saw a tear rolling down on my mum's cheek. I wanted to comfort her, hold her, but I couldn't. I screamed but no noise came out. I can't take this. Not again.

We arrived at the hospital, and I saw my mother and my younger self running out of the car to the hospital.

Black.

I was in a chair next to a hospital bed. I saw myself standing on the other side of the bed, holding my brother's hand. I heard myself screaming at him to wake up. That he couldn't leave me too. That he had to keep fighting. I saw myself break down. I looked behind me and saw my mother there fast asleep on the other chairs. She looked miserable. She was still wearing the clothes she wore when we found out. The accident was two days ago in this moment. 

I've been through this moment a hundred times before. 

I heard a door open and a tall man wearing a white coat came in. He woke up my mum and told us to come with him. My mother and my younger self went with the doctor, and I was left alone with my brother. I wanted to touch him, but I was still trapped.

Black.

I was still in the hospital, but I was in the hallway. I saw me and my mother hugging a few seats next to me. I knew what was going to happen. I wanted to scream. I wanted to run. I saw the same doctor approaching them. I didn't want to look, but I couldn't take my eyes of them. I couldn't hear the doctor talking, but I knew exactly what he was saying. I saw my mother fall on her knees, and I wanted to help her. Support her. 

"Harper."

Black

I shoot up and come face to face with my mother. I'm breathing heavy and sweating like hell. Before I can do anything else she crushes me in a hug like only a mother knows how to give. I can't believe what just happened.

I had the dream again.

It's been a month since the last time it happened. The first month I'd have them at least four times a week. But it lessened over time. It's always the same. First the car, then the hospital room and it ends with the hallway scene. The length of the last scene depends on when my mother wakes me up. Sometimes the hallway scene goes on for ages, but she's always there. I start crying in my mother's arms while she comforts me. She knows what to do in moments like this. I calm down after a while and my mother leaves to get me a glass of water.

"I can't believe it happened again." I said quietly, my voice hoarse from crying so much.

"I know sweetie, I came as soon as I heard you scream." She whispers while hugging me again. She laid me down and it didn't take that long this time to drift back asleep.

...

I wake up at ten am by a loud noise and a shriek from the kitchen. My mum is, well was, probably making breakfast. I pull the black covers off me and make my way over there, stopping at my brother's room. I haven't been in there since he died, since he left us. I take a step forward and put my hand on the door.

"Harper! Come eat breakfast!" I hear my mother shout. I take a step back and go to the kitchen only to find my mum sitting on the counter eating cereal. The kitchen was an absolute mess.