infinite darkness | leon kennedy

chapter one: breathing

Elastic Heart - Sia

8 Years Later, 2006

My name is Flora Smith. In 1998, Raccoon City turned into an apocalyptic war zone. I survived it. I lost someone very close to me that night in September. His name was Richard Robertson. He was taken too soon and I never imagined myself ever getting over the loss. I think I contemplated suicide more than fifty times that night. I escaped my death too many times to count because of someone I met. Someone who helped me survive that night. Someone who helped me get rid of the apocalypse. His name is Leon Scott Kennedy. He'd just started his job as a police officer, he never expected to be thrown into a giant lab and have to take down multiple mutations of the G-Virus Umbrella created. But we did it together. We saved Raccoon City together. We gave those lost lives their justice by completely destroying Raccoon City. The government blew it to nothing just a few days after. There is no more Raccoon City. It's now just a flat piece of land, but it is also a large cemetery for those who couldn't make it out alive. I think of them every day, I honor them every day, and every day I am so thankful for being alive and well.

The day after everything was quite traumatizing. I could not be left alone because I had abandonment issues. Leon let me stay in his home just outside of Raccoon City for the longest time. I think it was months until I was able to see my mom in Washington.

I sort of became popular since then. I'd get calls and emails every day from reporters asking me about everything that happened. I always rejected the offers, even when they made deals with me that would pay me thousands. I just could not talk about it yet. Eventually, I had to change my phone number and my email because I was getting tired of the offers. I wanted to escape this whole apocalypse thing and never have to think about it ever again, but I knew deep down that wouldn't be possible. It was too mind-boggling to ever be forgotten.

Six months after the incident, I went to therapy. Therapy was okay for the first few weeks, then I began having terrible nightmares and couldn't and wouldn't sleep at night. I was diagnosed with insomnia, depression, generalized anxiety, PTSD, and social phobia. You could say my life had been ultimately ruined. I never wanted to go out in the sunlight ever again. It even got so bad that I had to stop looking in mirrors because even looking at myself would give me horrible memories. I was lazy at taking care of myself. I maybe showered once every two weeks. I laid in bed for practically half of my days while living with Leon. I do feel bad for putting Leon through all of that. He had lots of stuff to get over as well. I let him have his moments. We both wept together at times, we both didn't take care of ourselves at times. But it got to the point where Leon didn't want to live like that anymore... and he began taking care of himself again. But never once did he force me to make those same amends. He let me grieve and cope with things my way.

One year later, in 1999, I started getting much better. I started showering normally again, I started eating again, I brushed my teeth twice a day, I got out of bed and went outside for hikes. Leon was there by my side through it all, and still, I wasn't ready for him. The agreement he and I made on the train back in Raccoon City was we were to wait for one another, we would wait for us to heal before getting into any kind of relationship. One year and I could not be ready. I wasn't even close to being ready. Leon was sort of ready, but he still waited for me.

I did leave Leon's home at some point. My mom found me a home in the countryside. You could say it was in the middle of nowhere. Good thing is, it wasn't too far from Leon's home so I could visit him whenever I wanted. I'd have to walk a few gravel roads but that was always okay. My abandonment issues weren't horrible anymore. But that's not to say some nights weren't bad... because believe me, I had a lot of bad nights. Nights where I'd wake up from a nightmare and not fall asleep again, only getting three to four hours of sleep.