Me: I've been feeling like sh!t recently. It's time to cope in a healthy way.
The healthy way:
///
Shads: *Drops something* fuCK YOU PHYSICS-
-
Jase: SHADS!
Shads, standing before a massacred crowd: Yes?
Jase: WHAT DID YOU DO?!
Shads: The real question is what didn't I do-
-
Galaxy: Okay, I'm going to make this really easy for you. Can I just get a small fry?
Birb, working at a fast food place with severe anxiety: ...chocolate or vanilla?-
-
Shads: If I had to choose between eating a vegetable or making a deal with Demented, I would rather get crushed to death by a falling building-
-
Birb doing a horror gameplay: Oh look, a letter! I have friends! :D
*turns letter over to find a bloody photo*
Birb: oh that's not a letter that's a threat-
-
Birb: "Are you a top or a bottom?"
Birb: h o n e y
Birb: I'm a b u r d e n -
-
Shads: We all know arson is a violent crime that should never be committed out of human decency.
*pedophiles exist*
Shads, menacingly holding a lighter: However-
-
~before Jase got tall~
Shads, arguing with him: No- cuz I know you ain't talking about size, you're f-ckin' fun-sized bro. You are the very DEFINITION of fun-sized, shortstack!
Jase, looking very offended: ...did you say fun-sized??
Shads: Yes!
Jase: ...s-say it- say it louder for the people in the back.
Shads, with the smuggest smile: Fun-sized.
Jase, summoning his scythe: I'ma beat your ass-
Shads: o H-
-
Peregrine: Why do you guys like being in the rain so much?
Bird: The rain is fun! I like to splash in the puddles, plus it's nice and cold!
Shads: I'm trying to stop Bird from getting struck by lightning-
-
Me: Oh? What's that? Off in the distance? Could it be-? Oh, but it is!
Me: My last fuck, disappearing over the horizon!- Be free, old friend; be free-
Galaxy: I literally just asked you to try to be nice to Shads-
-
Galaxy: So, let's say I killed someone.
Birb, deadpan: Where's the body.
Galaxy: This is only hypothetical.
Birb: Where. Is. The. Body.
Galaxy:
