Ghost - [SEUNGJIN]

1

Youngblood thinks there's always tomorrow
I miss your touch on nights when I'm hollow

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"Han Jisung get back here before I get mad."

Chan's voice echoed through the dorm as the rest of Straykids gathered in the kitchen. Minho and Felix were finishing to set up the table as Jeongin and Hyunjin simply observed the leader fight with Jisung over the last piece of bread.

"It's your fault for not going grocery shopping, it was your day.", the younger shrugged, dodging another attack.

"You guys know we have bread at our dorm right?"

Chan glared at Hyunjin, changing his focus for a while.

"Then go get it."

"I'm not the one craving bread.", the long haired smiled teasingly, saved by the bell immediately as Minho screamed over them so that everyone could hear.

"Dinner's ready, get your asses here immediately."

Jeongin's head perked up, his nose scrunching up. "What about Changbin and Seungmin Hyung?"

"They're coming". Felix smiled. "Changbin texted that they just left the gym."

The six guys finally sat down, slowly starting to fill their plates, conversations happening back and forward, everyone trying to distract themselves as they waiting for the missing members.

As the door opened, the first thing Hyunjin did was take a bite as Chan and Minho looked at the new arrivals, hoping no one would betray him and tell the oldest members. Only then he decided to turn to smile at the two guys.

Changbin dropped his bag, hair wet from the shower they had probably took and headed to the table, tilting Felix's head and placing a kiss on his boyfriend's forehead, while Seungmin sat next to Hyunjin, smiling softly at the guys that were teasing the couple.

It had been months since Changbin had finally been able to start fighting his struggles, meanwhile they had changed to two dorms, Jeongin had released his solo and him and the leader had gotten together, Jisung and Minho had celebrated two years of dating, it was like a whole life had passed and everyone was finally happy, like they were all finally having a good life.

The shorter sat down and the conversations started again, the typical dinner they had as a group everytime.

Hyunjin smiled along, taking his time to really take in every single smile he could see on his members faces. And every second he stared at them he felt worse.

His hand slowly moved to Seungmin's thigh under the table, caressing it softly until the younger boy moved his own hand to hold it.

Hyunjin could hear Seungmin's breathing tense next to him, he could swear that if he concentrated, he would be able to hear the boy's heart pounding agains his chest.

Seungmin smiled at something Changbin said about their day at the gym, and nodded along, dropping a joke that made everyone laugh.

Hyunjin hated it. The smiles on their faces, the clueless eyes.

He hated that they didn't know, but he also hated that knowing could ruin the happiness they had fought for.

He slowly leaned closer to Seungmin, eyes glued to his plate, the fork moving the food around, but not once making it to his mouth.

Hyunjin hated that he was the only one who saw it, when it was right in front of them.

"Just one bite.", he whispered, heart aching as the younger silently shook his head.

"I can't.", his voice was weak, weaker than the usual. And if Hyunjin's heart wasn't broken into pieces all the times before, this was the time.

He squeezed the younger's hand on his lap, thumb rubbing circles over the younger's palm, hoping his own voice wouldn't break.

"Just one bite."

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I chose to use Seungmin's cover of Ghost instead of anything else because I somehow feel like it fits the fading away theme, and that's the feeling I want to express the most here.

The reminder for this chapter is that you are loved, you are seen.

I love you. I'm here for you.