The Russian Princess

Chapter 23-Caught

"We can be here all day. I have nowhere to be and neither do you. Don't worry about Adriana she is with the nanny" Carlos said as he sat down in front of me

2 hours later

"Lexi just talk to me. We can work it out. Just let it out. I'm here for you. I promised I wouldn't let you fall and I won't" Carlos said

"I'm already falling" I mumbled but Carlos heard it

"What do you mean," Carlos said

I took a deep breath and ignored him

"Okay then if you won't tell me I will have to guess

Is it William?

Is it Adriana?

Is it Diego and Amelia" Carlos said I took a sharp breath when he said their names

"What about Diego and Amelia," Carlos said as I stared at him emotionless

"Is it their death?" He said and I looked away

"What about their death?" He said and I looked away so he couldn't see my face

"Stop. PLease stop" I whispered and he stopped talking

"Just tell me, Lexi. Please. I miss you and Adriana misses you" Carlos said and I took a deep breath

"FINE. WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?? WELL LETS SEE. FIRST YOU CALLED ME EMOTIONAL AND THEN I REALIZED EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING BECAUSE OF ME. DIEGO AND AMELIA DIED BECAUSE OF ME. I AM THE REASON THEY ARE DEAD. HAPPY" I screamed at him

"Lexi. It wasn't your fault" Carlos said and I ignored him

"Lexi," he said sternly

"I want you to say it. Say it wasn't my fault" Carlos said

"No" I replied

"Why"

"Because it was my fault. If I never became leader then Adriana would still have both of her parents and I would still be with my family" I said and Carlos just stared at me

"Lexi. I know it might look like that, but nothing is your fault. everything that happened, happened for a reason" Carlos said, but I just ignored him

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW IT FEELS TO KNOW THAT THE BABY YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF AS YOUR OWN IS ONLY WITH YOU BECAUSE HER PARENTS DIED BECAUSE OF YOUR CHOICES," I screamed

"I have a feeling that's not all," Carlos said and I shook my head no

" IMAGINE BEING THE NUMBER ONE ASSASSIN IN THE WORLD KNOWN FOR BEING EMOTIONLESS AND RUTHLESS. NOW SHE CRIES BASICALLY EVERY DAY AND ISN'T BADASS ANYMORE. DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS HEARING ALL THE OTHER ASSASSINS TALK ABOUT THEIR MISSIONS AND ALL I CAN DO IS TRY TO IMAGINE I DID THE KILL. I HAVENT GONE ON A MISSION IN MONTHS" I Screamed,

"so you want to go on a mission?" Carlos asked

"NO. I WANT TO BE ME AGAIN, NOT JUST AN EMOTIONAL GIRL WHO CRIES EVERY CHANCE SHE GETS AND IS WEAK. SHE CAN'T EVEN STOP HER EX-BOYFRIEND FROM BOTHERING HER AND THE PEOPLE SHE CARES ABOUT" I Screamed as I fought against the handcuffs

"Lexi, crying is not a weakness and yes you might have been crying more than usual since you got to russia, but who can blame you. Your family disowned you, your boyfriend chose his mafia over you, and you went to live with the man who made your childhood hell and that ex-boyfriend has made it his mission to harm you  " Carlos said and I just shrugged

"I forgave Diego. I was fine living with him" I said and he sighed

"Lexi. You might have felt fine, but your mind was panicking. I saw that every time you saw him you were careful with what you said and did because you were afraid he was going to hit you. Diego saw it too and knew you would be fine with time" Carlos said

"You seemed fine and felt fine, but your mind couldn't handle it so it just breaks down time to time and that's okay. Crying is okay. Crying doesn't make you weak. Now say it with me"

"Their death wasn't my fault" we said and the same time and I'm not going to lie it felt nice saying it out loud

"Anything else you want to share with me since we're having a heart-to-heart" Carlos said and I took a deep breath

"Please don't be mad" I whispered and Carlos nodded his head

" when I started middle school I was bullied for eating a lot at lunch since Diego wouldn't let me eat at the house, I ate a lot at school and this made a group of girls start bullying me it was happening for a year straight. After that long I started believing them so after eating I would go into the bathroom and throw up. This kept happening until the teacher caught me and called Diego. When Diego Arrived and picked me up he took me back to the house and beat me until I almost passed out. This past week after eating I  threw up my food and I cut myself in the shower on my thigh because I felt numb and needed to feel something... anything and I also felt like you and Adriana would be happier without me" I said and Carlos walked over to me and hugged me

"I'm sorry. You felt like you couldn't come to me and let me help you. I'm sorry I broke our promise" he said as he hugged me tighter and uncuffed me from the chair. I immediately hugged him back and kissed him

"You didn't break the promise. I was falling but you caught me before I hit the ground" I said and kissed him

"Carlos" I said as I looked him in the eyes

"I love you too" I said and he smiled at me and kissed me softly as if he wanted me to feel the love in the kiss. It was soft and delicate and then it turned hot and heavy.

I broke the kiss since I couldn't breath anymore and Carlos started kissing down my neck

"I. Missed. You. So. Much" Carlos said kissing me before every word which made me run my hands all over him and land in his hair and pulled it which made him groan

He suddenly kissed my sweet spot which cause me to moan

"Carlos. We can't" I said trying to hold my moan

"Why not. Let's smash" Carlos said which made me laugh

"Why do you have to ruin the moment. Anyway we can't because knowing you it would take us hours and William is tied to a chair in my office" I said which cause Carlos to groan

"Fine we will continue this later" Carlos said and I nodded

"Later" I said smirking as I kissed him one last time

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Thanks for reading !!!!!!

Hope you enjoyed 😊😊

See you soon 😏😏

(A/N:: give me ideas as what you want to see in this book)