Mending You And I

Chapter Twenty

"Relax." He said to me but I couldn't. "I don't even know how to dance!" I hissed as lowly as I could, trying not to grab unwanted attention. He looked at me straight in the eyes and I piped down.

"That's fine. Just put your hand on my shoulder." He glanced at my arm as if motioning me to obey. I hesitantly put a shaking hand on his shoulder, holding in my breath. The closeness between the two of us was like a sharp knife and I wanted nothing but to break free.

"Good." Once my hand landed on his shoulder, he nodded once in approval. "Now, follow my movements. You just need to sway your body a little." He finished, his hand still on my waist.

I gulped painfully.

Don't be scared, Maryam. Don't show him your vulnerability.

And like that, the dance started. I gently rocked my body with him, feeling my feet getting heavier. Every step that I placed on the floor with extreme care, felt agonizing. The familiar scent of his cologne took me back to our wedding day but I quickly shook the thought off.

"You're doing great, Maryam." the compliment made me look up because the gentleness in his tone caught me off guard. He smiled at me, making me wonder if my eyes were playing tricks on me. Unconsciously, I smiled back nervously and looked down again.

We had been dancing for about five minutes when I felt him getting carried away. He wasn't keeping up with me anymore, making it hard for me to keep my balance. His grip on my waist had also loosened.

With a frown, I turned to look up at him again, expecting to meet his eyes on me. Instead, his eyes were fixated somewhere else. I trailed his gaze and my eyes fell on Noor who was not too far away from us now.

Her hand was placed on her partner's shoulder and she had her chin on his other shoulder. Between her giggles, she would look back at Abdullah every once in a while just to provoke him. And he, on the other hand, didn't dare strip his gaze away from her. Despite holding me in his arms, he was sharing a long stare with his girlfriend.

A pang of hurt hit me. Straight in the chest.

I halted.

Our rhythm broke, shaking him out of it. My hand left his shoulder and the feelings of nervousness and giddiness vanished like a puff of smoke. "Maryam?"

But, I couldn't handle it. I couldn't fight back my inner emotions. Without an answer or even a word, I pushed his hand away from my waist and walked off. The pain from the heels I was wearing felt nothing anymore. I saw the door we had come in through and quickly exited the ballroom.

With the stinginess in my eyes, I blinked to hold back my tears. I couldn't cry. I just couldn't let my precious tears go to waste on him. I told myself that it was just because I had gotten lost in the moment and felt like Abdullah was a kind and gentle husband like I've always wanted.

But he wasn't.

I knew a driver was waiting for us somewhere outside the huge mansion but I didn't have the energy to go look for him. The cold wind hit my face, blowing my dress with it. I shivered, not because of the cold but because of what I had just felt.

I stopped to look at my surroundings, remembering the last time I had ran out like that and getting lost only to end up taking David Wilson's help. There was the beautiful garden spread out on both sides, the mansion lights lighting it up like a big cluster of fireflies. I stepped into the garden and felt the dry grass, which had been wet when we came, tickle my feet through my heels.