Love at Second Sight

Chapter 12

Dearest Savannah,

In case you've already forgotten me (no chance, I know), let me refresh your memory. I am Ella Reece, your elder sister. Remember me now? Of course you do. Okay, so let's get right to it...

First of all, if you have this letter it means I'm dead. Otherwise I'd never let you invade my personal space. And, though, my memory has never been so commendable, I know this letter was hidden in the most private of my spaces. Somewhere you'd never think of going. My underwear drawer. Okay, bad joke, but laugh, Savannah. It's important you laugh at the pettiest of things. There's this saying, "When life gives you lemons..." but I don't think life will necessarily 'give' you lemons. I think it will 'throw' lemons at you. So what do you do? You say, "Ouch!", and laugh out loud at life's poor aim. (It doesn't matter where the lemon hit you, it is a poor shot nonetheless.)

First-off. Always remember, I'm there for you. Somewhere. Everywhere. Perhaps not physically. But you have me. Emotionally. I haven't left a lot for you. If I'd known a precise date of when I'd die, I would have. But you know, I didn't. No one did. It was like I knew my life was a train towards death, but I didn't have a clue where my stop was. No one does, I know. But believe me, it's worse to know 'you're dying' instead of 'you'll die someday, eventually'.

Anyway, getting to the point. I don't have many things to tell you. Mostly because I am (will be) dying at a young age...so I don't know a lot, myself. However, I do have things I want to share. And, I'm hoping my words will help you.

You know, when I was in college...sophomore year, I guess, I met this guy called Jason Fletcher. I'd had a crush on him for as long as I can remember, and certainly longer than I'd like to admit to you. One day, this guy, the man of my dreams, comes to me and says, "You're beautiful. I hope you know that." No one had ever said that to me before. You know why. So I was stunned when he did, I didn't know how to react at all. For the whole of the next two weeks, he tested me so much, with secret glances and coy smiles.

Then finally he asked me out. After all that teasing, he finally did. I was stunned (again). Yeah, yeah...I obviously said yes. And, oh God, if the whole time I spent with him wasn't the best time of my whole life. Stolen kisses, coy and suggestive smiles, deep and candid talks, pointless laughs and all the stupidity... I loved every damn second. I wouldn't trade my time with him for anything.

He was the Love of my life. Yes love with a capital L. Because it is the best feeling in the world, Savannah. Loving, being loved. All of love. Everything.

I'm telling you all this because I truly believe one of these days you're gonna fall in love, okay? No, don't get jumpy or nervous (saying this because I know you will). Listen to me. You will fall in love. But it's quite possible that the guy you 'like' will open up way before you've even realized your feelings towards him. (Saying this from experience with Jay. He was the proactive one.) If that happens, and if you do genuinely like him, even negligibly, then search for more reasons to believe him than not to. Get it? Try hard to believe him (or her...if you swing that way, that is. I don't know enough about you, so I don't know for sure).

I'm saying this because I've been in love. And, you might find this cheesy, but it pretty much is the best damn feeling in the world. Most people say being alone is best. 'Single and ready to mingle' and all that. But that's only until you find someone who makes you wanna 'not' mingle. Who makes you wanna be with only them through and through. And that's just it. And it feels... otherworldly. Try it, girl, I swear you'll agree.

I want you to do this next thing for me. And if you want begging, consider this as that. Live Your Life. I want you to do this. Yes, it is said we have many lives; some say three, some say seven, I don't know. No one does. It's a matter of religious beliefs. But what we do know is that: This is the life, right now. You don't know what was before, or what will be after. You just know what is now. So focus on that: Now. One moment at a time. Moments don't happen, Savannah. You make them. You have a say in how, where, when, with who and what kind they are. Remember that. Always.