Leave a light on

11

"I love you mommy, you can't die" Those words were playing on repeat in Meredith's head

"I'm gonna do everything I can to stay as long as possible with all of you" She smiled

"I heard them.. I heard them talk about you" Ellis whispered

"Ellie, what are you talking about?" Meredith gasped

"Mommy? Are you dying?" Bailey questioned

"I'm going nowhere! I'm staying with you guys" Meredith told them "I promise" She said giving them a smile

The kids seemed to hesitate but soonly gave in an started hugging their mom

"I'm sorry for scaring you guys! But I'm gonna be fine in a couple of months. It sounds extremely long but in the meantime we can cuddle as much as you want"

...

"I hate to see them.. this way" Meredith said

"I'm sorry, I didn't know I-"

"Derek, this isn't your fault. But I'm happy they're with Maggie and Amelia having dinner, I needed some time for us"

"Hmm?" Derek groaned as he scooted a bit closer to Meredith, his arm around her waist

"We need a will" She said, looking straight ahead

"A will?" Derek sat up immediately

"Derek.. don't make this even harder" Meredith sighed

"Mer, you're gonna be fine. We're gonna wait until there are lungs available and after your recovery you're gonna come home again" Derek said as he looked at her with sad eyes

"Derek, think as a doctor for a minute. There's a chance that there won't be lungs available, there's a chance I get another infection and I die before they can do the transplant." Tears were streaming down Meredith's eyes

"Don't think like that, you're-" Derek said as he got out of the bed and stuffed her up a bit more against pillows

"Derek, stop! Please, I wanna do everything I can but I need a will just in case." Meredith said, grabbing his hand with a weak grip she held him

"No, I'm not doing this" Derek said and started pacing "I'm gonna go get the kids. They should say goodbye before we leave home" Derek said

"Derek.." She sighed but it was too late, he already left the room and there was no stopping him.

Derek went to the cafeteria and took in a deep breath before entering

"Hey, kids" He said as he sat next to them

"Daddy!" They yelled, Zola immediately leaning against him

"What are you having?" He asked as he checked out their almost empty plates

"I had rice and chicken!" Zola said

"I just had a wrap" Bailey told him

"Our big man wasn't very hungry. Must have been because he ate all mommy's cookies" Maggie pointed out

"I had a cheeseburger with some fries" Ellie said silent

"I see, can I have some fries?" Derek asked

She shrugged her shoulders and laid her head on her hand as she kept staring at her food, playing a bit with it

"Someone in for ice cream?" Amelia asked

"Yes!" Zola yelled

"Bails?" Derek asked

"Maybe" He sighed and Derek frowned

"Ellis? Do you want some ice cream?" Amelia asked

The little girl shook her head and grabbed a few fries and stuffed them in her mouth before chewing on them

"Are you tired?" He asked her

She shrugged her shoulders again

"Let's continue dinner, then we can go see mommy before we go home" Derek said and rubbed Ellis' back

Zola was licking her ice cream, Bailey was apparently not full and already finished his cone when Ellis kept playing with the couple of fries left on her plate

Once Zola was done, Derek asked who wanted to go see their mom. All 3 kids got up and started almost running to the hospital room their mom was in.

"Not so fast" Derek chuckled as he tried to follow them

"Mommy!" All three kids ran in when Teddy was doing another exam on Meredith

"Hey, let's go wait in the hallway a bit longer" Derek said as he held them back from running in

"I'm done in a couple of minutes" Teddy told them as the kids walked into the hallway and Derek closed the door again

"How bad?" Meredith asked Teddy

"Meredith.. I-" Teddy started

"Chances?"

"We're not talking about chances. But I think you'll need your transplant sooner." Teddy said

Meredith nodded and kept quiet till the kids came in.

Mommy!" They yelled and climbed on the bed. Ellis struggled a bit and Bailey immediately offered to help her

"Hey! Did you guys have dinner with your aunties?" Meredith asked

"Yes!! But the food at home is way better" Bailey told her

"Hmm" Meredith sighed and embraced them, trying not to think about what Teddy just told her

Derek joined them and sat down at her feet and watched his family cuddling.

AN // Sorry for the lack of updates! I'm struggling with headaches that don't go away so I got glasses with blue filter but so far they didn't really help much and now I'm rambling hahaha but anyways, tomorrow I have my last day of school (Hopefully) and on Thursday I get the call where I'll get told if I passed and can graduate or not and I'm very busy finding apartments and all those kind of stuff so sorry, I'll try to update as much as possible!